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Did I go to work? Yes. I worked for about an hour and then fucked off for another three hours. I work part time. That's four hours a day. So, I usually work for about an hour and fuck off for about three. That makes $40 an hour, which sounds about right. Did you know that if minimum wage had kept up with the cost of inflation, it would be at least $20 an hour today? That's right! Get with it. Go know. It's a fact, Jack. So, I go to work until the day comes that they say go.
I did my usual routine today. I've been doing this routine for years and it's become part of my life. I need a new routine. What would it mean if I went to the Spanish Monastery every Saturday? What about if I went bowling every Saturday morning? Maybe I should just go to the botanical garden and spend a little while meditating. That's the ticket. We're on our way. Watch out. Here we come! It's the beginning of the end. What the hell? It's all about the routine? It's time for a new routine. That's the ticket. Give me one.
You know, it's a great big leap of faith to write exactly 100 words, no more, no less, here every day and then leave them here on the Internet for the whole word to read even if they read it right now after I wrote it or years from now when it will still be relevant because I've written nothing that is time sensitive because I know that 100 words is eternal and and that people come here to read all the time and that they know that this is the way it's supposed to be and that's it, darling.
Suddenly, I am filled with determination to make it a go. I'm tired of writing about it, talking about it, half-assed planning about it and I just have to make it happen. I think I'm going to treat it as throwing a party. I'm going to do the ground work and then pray that the party is a success. I think it's going to be okay. I'm ready for this beyond belief, times 100. It's my time and I'm going to make it happen. I never, never, never, never, never wanted to want this more. I'm so so ready!
Today was a day that was a day and it was a day that was. It was a day that went okay. It was a day and it passed much like any other day. It's now the end of the day and I'm thinking about what kind of day it was. It was a routine day. The usual routine with a few little odds and ends and things that were out of the ordinary but for the most part just another day. Am I ready for a whole new kind of day? Yes. You bet. Let's go. Ready for this!
Here we go, heading into the dog days of August. It's the hottest month? I think it's moved to September. August is the most special month of the year because it's the month when I was born. I think what life must have been like for Mom on this day some six decades ago. She was waddling around town just waiting for me to pop. And I waited until the very last day of the month. I like that my birthday falls on that day. It's a good day. Every day of the month of August is a good day.
I've been doing pretty well keeping up with the 100 words a day, no more, no less, exactly 100 words every single day. Okay, some days I write multiple entries. Thanks 100 days dot com for letting me do that. I like that. It makes for nice complete sets. It's odd that all these writings are out there and not editable or able to be deleted. It's okay. I'm okay with that. Someday someone will read these words and think what kind of person was up at 6 o'clock in the morning typing such drivel. What kind, indeed. Good day.
These are the lazy, hazy, crazy days of summer. The days of soda and pretzels and beer. These are the lazy, hazy, crazy, days of summer. I wish that summer would always be here. Except for the hot part. I come home in the afternoon and I'm just dripping wet. I have to remove my clothes and lie down with the fan on decapitate. It takes a good 10 minutes to regain composure to continue to carry on. It's not the heat. It's the humidity. It's not the steam. It's the stupidity. It's too darn hot. I need another nap.
My husband is an enabler. I went to Costco today and he asked me to buy artichoke dip. I knew it was going to be a nightmare. First, you have to buy enough dip for a family of 12. Next, I'm trying so hard to be dairy free. It's bad enough that the dip proclaims it is gluten free. Yay. That's because it's full of dairy and that's bad enough. I'm trying over here. It's not easy being fat and addicted to dairy products. I couldn't stop eating that fucking dip! If I don't buy it, I don't eat it!
It's 5 o'clock in the morning. Or is it still the middle of the night? I think it's already slipped into early morning. You can't say it's the middle of the night when the sunrise is imminent. I think the sun rises some time around 6 a.m. I could search for that information but I just want to finish writing today's 100 words and get some more shut eye before the actual craziness of the day takes over. It's going to be a fun one in these dog days of summer. I wish that summer could always be here.
I don't like Mondays but I have a new attitude. I have decided that Monday is as good a day as any other. There's no need to begin the week with a sour attitude. Every single day is worthwhile. There is important work to be done and I am ready to do it. Today is a good day to die. But I won't die today. I have a few more left in me. I don't know how many more, but I know that I'm not going like Robin Williams. At least I don't think so this week. Whither the future?
What is this, Tuesday? What is it about Tuesday? I don't like Tuesday even more than I don't like Monday. Today was a very bad day. I was unable to move from the bed for the entire day. Needless to say, I didn't go to work to do the very important things that await me there. I just didn't have the get up and go. Yeah, that's right. My get up and go just got up and went. So I stayed home and laid in bed the entire day. I just lolled about and you know what? It wasn't bad!
I'm having a dilemma. The job wants to add another component to my position. After I agreed, I realized that I need to get compensated accordingly. I wrote an email and it was deflected in the good corporate manner. Blown off with a comment like, "We can discuss this tomorrow." Yes, tomorrow is another day but I know that my time at this organization is quickly coming to an end. I did issue an ultimatum. Either I get a raise, or I walk. And I stated the terms of the raise. It's non-negotiable! That's all there is to it.
I'm supposed to think about staying at my job. I don't know how I feel about it. I don't really want to deal with the bureaucrats. It's defeating and deflating and disorienting. I'm over it. I was also told that I'm not really doing that good of a job. That's because the bureaucrats have succeeded in lying about every move I have made and turned me into an unprofessional loser. I should just leave and let someone else get beat up. I'm pretty sure that tomorrow is going to be my last day unless I get the raise I want.
Beware the Ides of August. And TGIF baby. What else is new under the sun? Same shit, different day. Well, isn't that a fine kettle of fish? What's the word, mockingbird? I'm over the moon and a little under the weather. Where the hell did that come from? Not all who wonder are lost. Those who wander wonder where to wander. Where the hell did that come from? This is a blank page until I fill it with these marvelous 100 words. Life is beautiful, n'est-ce pas? Well, ain't that purdy? You sure do have a pretty mouth, yeah.
The heart is like a flower - unless it is open it cannot release its fragrance into the world. That's what the Brahma Kumaris taught me. I wonder what the smell that's coming from me is like. I was thinking that maybe it's like that oleander hedge I passed this weekend. Danger was all I could hear in my head. I was thinking how nice it smelled, but I was avoiding it at all costs. I have memories of oleander from decades ago that have made me irrationally fear that plant. It's a killer, folks. Stay away, for your own good!
Oleander has a sweet smell and it is poisonous. What are other dichotomies of everyday living? Why do we eat the same things over and over? Food can be so boring. I'm getting old must be. I like to try different cuisines. Our neighbors have left and yet we stay. Is there something wrong with us? Or are we just lazy? Or are we bucking the trend? We still haven't gotten over the house being torn down on the corner. That's two out of four. Of course, one was torn down before we ever got here. What's the big deal?
Successful people do not vilify Monday. It is, after all, just another day. Don't you agree? I don't like Mondays. I want to shoot the whole day down. I think it's because of the weekend syndrome. Those folks who live for the weekend are not so very successful. I must learn to live each day to its fullest. Is that possible? Are some days less full than others? Is life passing me by? There it goes! It just passed me by! Pass me by. Pass me by. If you don't happen to like it, pass me by. Pass me by.
The dog days of summer are here. They kind of sneaked up on us, but nevertheless, if it's the end of August, then surely these are the dog days of summer. I never thought of it before, but September is nearly as cruel as August, but toward the end of the month things do start to cool a little as summer is just a memory. And the seasons, they go round and round. It's amazing how quickly the summer passed this year. It's already past. I wonder as I wander. Not all who wonder are lost. Do you wander? Yea.
Why ask why? Drink Bud dry. The Budweiser frogs seem like they appeared very long ago. You know why it seems so very long ago? Because that was decades ago. That's why. That's when I was young and had a lot of friends. Now where are they? Scattered to the four corners of the earth, they are. Now it all comes down to that one race, caucasian. Sure you have rights! You have the right to remain silent. You are going to be blamed for everything. There's a reason why they are doing that. And you know what it is.
We don't need another hero. We don't need another way home. There's a couple of things that we can't live without - air and water. And those things are no longer free at the gas station. Isn't that fresh? There's a machine that doles out air and water but first you have to put some quarters into it. That seems so unfair to charge for compressed air and basic water. People will choose to drink a bottle of water over a glass of water from the tap. They have been brainwashed to think tap water is bad. What the what what?
TGIF baby and all that jazz and it's another Friday already that week was flying and that was the week that was and that's all there is and that's all that I have to write about and that's a good thing and that's a thing already and there are a lot of the word and in this entry and that's because I decided to write one long run on sentence and the only way I know to join a bunch of disjoined ideas is to connect them with the word and and then before I know it, 100 words already.
This was a car week and I took the car three times for the same thing yet ended up having three other things fixed and when I took it back for the third time I told them they weren't allowed to find anything wrong since I just came in for something rather simple and ended up spending too much money and the car is running smooth and I just pray that it continues to run that way for awhile longer because one more thing might push me over the edge and I kind of like writing a 100 word sentence.
All I could think about today was the anniversary of Hurricane Andrew. People only want to talk about it if it's a fun anniversary like 20 years ago or 25 years ago and this year marks 22 years ago so in three years there will be a big deal made of it. That really was the last major hurricane that hit here and there have been plenty of others since but that was really the last big one. I hope not to live through another big one but it seems the way weather has become so extreme, that it's possible.
Today was the first day of my retirement, or at least this phase of it. I've been in retirement for a couple of years but I was working part time for awhile and today is the first day that I didn't have to go to work since I gave up that job. I have applied to work at the newspaper and that may materialize but I'm not really counting on it. Anything is possible. I would carpool with a couple of girls from down the street. That's the best part. I guess it would be a good thing after all.
It's odd not working. I like retardment, but I need some structure. I still want at least a part time job, not so much for the money but for something to do. I need to keep occupied. That's very important. I know that it's okay to do nothing but I need to do something. Plus it's good to feel needed, no? Yes! I want to do something meaningful. I was doing meaningful work but dealing with the bureaucratic nonsense was too much for me. I wasn't made for that sort of B.S. And it's bullshit with capital letters, yes.
I'm all caught up with my 100 words entries. I was almost two whole weeks behind. I'm so glad that the admins of this site let you slide, at least until the end of the month. I can't imagine writing a whole months worth of 100 words at once. But I'm sure it happens! That's why it's best to keep up with the 100 words on a daily basis. I like writing here, it's good to put this out to the world. It's odd that it can never be taken back. I wonder if I were to try to rescind.
Brahma Kumaris wisdom: The past is history, so let it go. The future is a mystery, so let it come. The present is a gift – be truly in the present today and release all your fears (based on the past) and your worries (imagined futures) – this is the work of someone who truly wants to awaken, and break free from the anchors and burdens of dead yesterdays and speculative tomorrows. Be here now they say, easier said than done, I hear you say. But no one can stop us, except for ourselves. There is only now – everything else is avoidance.
Here we go, it's Labor Day Weekend. My favorite holiday of the year, and the most loathed holiday of the year. This year, my birthday is only a day away from Labor Day. I always loved August 31. It always felt so special to me. Of course, later when I realized that most people are born in September because their parents were fucking on Christmas or New Year's Eve, it became a little less special. Nevertheless, I have always felt special about being born on such an odd day, the last day of August and the unofficial end of summer.
Another Saturday where I went from one end of the county to the other. It's okay. At least the car is fixed. I visited Helen after I was done at the car place. Then I went to Costco and came home for a nap. It's my birthday weekend so we went out for dinner. We are planning a trip to NYC near the end of October to see the changing of the leaves. Raoul went alone last year, but we're going together this year (and probably getting married.) That's a nightmare, but it's probably a good thing for tax purposes.
It's my birthday. Let's party. We went to the Raleigh and drank bloody marys like there was no tomorrow. That was fun. Then we came back home and passed out for a few hours. When we woke up later in the evening, it was like having another day. We stayed up way too late, but that's okay because tomorrow is a holiday! I wish I were at a job where I got paid for not working but that is not happening for the time being. It was just another day, but soon I will get a check from social security.
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