01/17 Direct Link
There is always a risk that something can happen to someone you care about. But, how do you get through each day when that someone has a higher risk? That someone has health conditions that could take her life at any time. Always wondering and worrying about what that someone is doing. Sitting in a hospital so frequently that the nurses and doctors know you both. Getting phone calls telling you to come to the hospital. Then one day you get the call that says, "you need to get here now." How do you get through each day after that?
01/18 Direct Link
Warts. My new fantasy is that he gets a horrible case of warts. On his face. Nothing he does makes them go away. My old fantasies were the typical - he desparately begs me to come back, I laugh and shut the door in his face. I'm at a point where I don't want him to want me back. But, I'm not ready for him to walk away scott-free. So, I think warts will do just fine. Nothing terminal but affects his ego and gives him discomfort. Why don't we throw a corn in just for the fun of it?
01/19 Direct Link
Life can be odd. So up and down. I am seeing tradegy and pure joy around me. One friend sits by her daughter's side while she fights for her life. Another just found out that he created a life. He is experiencing joy. She's experiencing horror. And, I am watching them both - feeling for both. I talk to him and the joy just flows naturally. I talk to her and humor is forced. Horror seeps through every word. It is easy to support joy. How do you support fear? Ask questions? Listen to someone who doesn't want to talk? What?
01/20 Direct Link
I sit in a warm, cozy bedroom while outside an ice storm has begun to hit. It is cold but, I am cuddled under the covers. My dog is curled up beside me. I am day dreaming of night dreaming. What will I dream tonight? Growing a spectacular set of wings and soaring over mountains and oceans? My teeth and hair falling out? Sliding down rainbows? Falling down a flight of stairs and breaking my third arm? Maybe I will dream of an ice storm. Of being cuddled under the cozy covers, with my warm dog snuggled up beside me.
01/21 Direct Link
I need a new TV. Why? Because she says I do. Do I agree? No. We go back and forth. I hold onto my opinion. She holds onto hers. I am obviously right. So is she. I don’t watch much TV. She does not watch my TV. She thinks mine is old and out-dated. I don't care. It works. I don't want a new one. Why should I replace it? How can I be wrong? She finally concedes. I win! I turn on my TV. The picture goes out. The volume goes out. I need a new TV.
01/22 Direct Link
In my dream, with head bent, I knelt. A stunningly beautiful angel stood beside me, gently tapping, saying “Go ahead. Do it.” I was dumbfounded & amazed. Unsure why. “Go ahead,” another tap. From my chest, I pulled a gleeming blue orb with spectacular diamonds glowing like sunshine. I handed the orb over. As I handed it, I peaked up. I gasped. Jesus. He was smiling a gentle loving smile. I handed Him my soul. I couldn’t believe this incredible being was standing before me. I was stunned. My body jerked awake. I suddenly awoke and knew it was real.
01/23 Direct Link
As a kid, my mom told crazy stories. I was not her daughter. My real parents were aliens that came to earth via UFO. They explored earth and flew home. They forgot me. She found me on the doorstep and pity convinced her to keep me. In the next version, my parents were gypsies. When I would cry, she would say, “You’re too sensitive.” I felt hurt. Now, I find it (as it was intended)amusing. She was joking. Only seeking laughter. I am grateful. It added to my sense of humor and an incredibly strong desire for independence!