BY thefish

12/01 Direct Link
The date went well. They sat in the restaurant chatting and getting to know one another. The lady was personable, witty and charming. The gentleman was much the same. During the course of the evening, she made mental notes during the conversation. Doesnít drink. Check off. Unemployed. Check off. Lecture about exercise and smoking. Check off. The lady decided that the gentlemen was perhaps just a little too straight laced for her. The lady has a slight wild streak. Any man she dates will need one too. The lady decided to keep looking until she finds what sheís looking for.
12/02 Direct Link
She met the man for coffee. He was tall and well built for his age. They had more in common than the last date. She happily chatted away while they sat at the train station across from the beach. The sun was shining and the waterís surface was a dazzling display of blinding jewels dancing on the surface of the water. He confessed that he enjoyed smoking pot. She smiled. That is part of the slight wild streak she needs in the man she dates. She couldnít date anyone that didnít have just a little of the devil in them.
12/03 Direct Link
I cannot believe Christmas is just a scant few weeks away! I actually went out and bought a $20 tree and set it up on my dining table. It is beautiful. I do love the aroma and sight of a Christmas tree in the house. I decorated the tree with glee, stood back and announced my tree to be the loveliest tree. The candles were burning brightly as I settled in with a glass of wine. Yes, I do love Christmastime. I think this year will be the best ever. No angry, mean, drunk boyfriend for me this year. Wooopppeeeee!!!
12/04 Direct Link
Dear Mother: Today is your birthday. Today you are 77 years old. In those 77 years you have been married, divorced, birthed 4 children, held a variety of jobs, bought a house, raised those 4 children on your own, reupholstered furniture, hung paneling, painted, sewn clothes, buried your own mother and father, welcomed grand-children and spoiled them rotten. You have endured countless surgeries and youíre still here. You have endured heartache that othersí can only imagine. You have come through it all. Mother, you are the strongest woman I know and am grateful for the strength you instilled in me.
12/05 Direct Link
This is getting very interesting. I saw him again. He called on Sunday to say how much he enjoyed meeting me on Friday. We chatted and discovered that our typical evening at the Pub is Tuesday. I said I hoped I would see him there on that night. He stated the same. He was there. The sparks were flying. I walked him to his van and climbed inside for more chit chat and privacy. He kissed me. It was good. I just donít know how weíll get around the wheel chair thing, but Iím willing to give it a go.
12/06 Direct Link
We chatted for a little while last night. I called him. I get the feeling he doesnít mind at all. He stated when he called on Sunday that I could call him any time. Well, I was feeling a little embarrassed about how tipsy I got on Tuesday and decided to call him and follow up on the conversation we were having. He was delighted to hear from me. There is definitely something going on between us and I do not get the impression he just wants to get into my pants. I get the feeling he really likes me.
12/07 Direct Link
Wheels called me tonight. I was planning on staying home and chilliní on this Friday night. He was at the Pub. He was only going to be there for a short while longer and wanted me to come down for a quick drink. I had to go. I really like this guy. I donít know what to expect. I know he seems to be really interested in me. He even said he wants to take things slow. That is just fine with me. Jumping in too fast has been my weakness. Iím determined to be stronger this time. I promise.
12/08 Direct Link
What can I say about today in 100 words? Laundry. Laundry and more laundry. I think I did over 8 loads of laundry today. Back and forth to the on-site Laundromat all day. Back and forth with the heavy baskets of clothes. Nylons, jeans, towels, colors, blacks, whites. You name it, I washed it today. I hate doing laundry. It is my pet peeve of housework. And it matters not if I have indoor laundry or if I have to trek it to a laundry facility, it still piles up. I put it off until I have nothing to wear.
12/09 Direct Link
I am soooooo bored with life right now. I hate being bored. I donít know how to shake this boredom. I have started painting a picture, but I have lost the enthusiasm I had when I started it. I should get out my sewing machine and work on a quilt I had planned on making. I should write about all the profound thoughts I have concerning the world, people, religion and itís effects on society. I should do a lot of things. But somehow the boredom takes over and I am stagnant. I hope this isnít a sign of depression.
12/10 Direct Link
The dating game didnít pan out too well from the internet dating site. I canít win for losing. Truthfully, neither of the men I went out with really rang any of my bells very well. Ironically, I didnít sleep with them or even kiss them goodnight and I still didnít get called for another date. Iíll state it againÖI canít win for losing. What a dumb statement. Of course if Iím losing, I ainít winning. How about I canít get a break in the dating department? That sounds better. Besides winning and losing make it sound like a game.
12/11 Direct Link
God!!! I am an idiot. I may have messed things up with Wheels. I knew he probably wouldnít be at the Pub because he was having a procedure done due to some pain problems heís been having. I called around sixish to see how he was. Heíll live he said to me. But he wouldnít be coming to the Pub. I wished him well and went on my way. Later, after a few too many drinks, I called him again. I have no idea what I said or if I even got him on the phone. I am understandably mortified!!!
12/12 Direct Link
I spoke with Wheels and he laughed. I didnít actually talk to him that night but left a message on his voicemail. I cannot recall one syllable of that phone call. He said I hadnít messed anything up. He said it was all good. He still hasnít taken me out on a date yet. Heís dragging his feet. Thatís ok though. Iím not sure if I want to become involved with a man in a wheelchair. Itís not just that he canít use his legs. He has some health problems to deal with. Iím not sure I can handle it.
12/13 Direct Link
100 words appear on the page, 100 words appear. Write one down, pass it around. 99 words appear on the page. 99 words appear on the page, 99 words appear. Write one down, pass it around. 98 words appear on the page. 98 words appear on the page, 98 words appear. Write one down, pass it around. 97 words appear on the page. 97 words appear on the page, 97 words appear. Write one down, pass it around. 96 words appear on the page. 96 words appear on the page, 96 words appear. Write one down, pass it around. Done!
12/14 Direct Link
I am as happy as I can be. Boss Lady handed out the Holiday company schedule for this year and, Oh Happy Day, we are off on the 21st early and donít have to come back until January 2! Thatís right, folks, Friday half-day, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday. Thatís 11 days and one Ĺ day. What a wonderful Christmas gift from the company this year. I havenít had that many days off in a row in over 3 years. What am I going to do with myself??? Iím sure Iíll think of something!
12/15 Direct Link
The Prodigal Son and I are not doing very well. He has ruined my Christmas spirit. How many times did I ďadviseĒ him not to leave his job before he had another one? How many times did I remind him that he usually had two days off during the week and sometimes his schedule had him going in at 5:00 p.m. giving him plenty of time to look? What does he do? He goes on a week long vacation during Thanksgiving week, comes back, works a few days and, poof, now that job is history! I canít take it anymore!!!!!!!!!!!
12/16 Direct Link
I picked up Missy for a day of girlie stuff. We had lunch at my favorite Mexican restaurant and all the homeboys were so happy to see me. I donít get by there as much as I used to because I have moved so far away. After a Corona, girl talk and blackened chickened burrito served wet, we headed over to the nail salon for one of her Christmas gifts. I am paying for her new set of nails. Then we chatted more and had a lovely time. I miss my girl so much. Sheís getting so grown up! Yikes!
12/17 Direct Link
As I was happily moving around my kitchen in preparation for some Holiday baking, my cell phone began to ring. The area code was from Louisiana. HmmmÖ.I wondered. Who could it be? I was surprised to hear the voice of my best girl-friend from High School on the other end. The news was not good. My friend is dying. She wonít be here much longer. I had wondered how she was doing. I hadnít heard from her lately. Now I know why. My heart is heavy and saddened by this news. I wish there was something I could do.
12/18 Direct Link
Just when I thought I was going to be spending a miserable Christmas at home alone this year (the Prodigal Son and I are not communicating well), a miracle occurs. I called my Mom and she insisted on giving me her credit card number so I could book a flight and go home for the Holidays. I canít believe it!!! One day I am sad and depressed because I donít want to be here for Christmas and I want to see my friend before she dies. And now Iím on my way. Iíll be traveling all day on Christmas Eve.
12/19 Direct Link
Iím Pissed!!! The Ex informed me that he canít watch Bo while Iím in Louisiana next week. He says Jealous Bitch would have a hissy fit and he wants to avoid an argument. I was livid. How can he let her get in the way of our friendship because she is irrationally jealous? He canít watch my dog or give me a ride to the airport for fear of ruffling her precious feathers. Naturally, I wondered, why he never minded ruffling my feathers. Asshole!!! He made me feel small and insignificant even though he proclaimed he was on my side.
12/20 Direct Link
Just as the sun must set, so shall we. Just as the moon must be hidden for a time, so shall we. Just as the waves must retreat back into the ocean, so shall we. Just as the rain must replenish the earth, so shall we. Just as the whippoorwill calls for her young, so shall we. Just as all good things must come to an end, so shall we. Just as the stars must shine their light in the darkness, so shall we. Just as the crimson leaves must fall, so shall we. For Cindy: Rest in Peace, Sweetheart.
12/21 Direct Link
Finally!!! Work is over for 11 days in a row. I didnít think we would ever get out of there. We were supposed to leave early for the holidays. By the time we got all the food together (I made two quiche and they turned out pretty good considering I had never made quiche before) and ate, it was 2:30 before we could leave. The Boss Lady was up in her office for over an hour while we waited patiently for the word go. We sure would have liked to leave sooner, but the Boss Lady is the gate keeper.
12/22 Direct Link
The time was early. It was cold. I waited for about 30 minutes for my group to arrive. We introduced ourselves and settled in to wait for the frost to thaw. Our tee-time was delayed by over an hour. When we finally got on the course, the sun had come out and it was a beautiful day. I only had one bad drive while the fellas were each taking two to three tries at it to get a good tee-shot. I have to admit, I love it when I kick the boysí asses. Gotta love golf! And I do, IMMENSELY!!!
12/23 Direct Link
I am leaving town for Louisiana over the holidays. I called the Ex to ask if my dog Bo could stay at his place while I was gone. No go, he said. He didnít want to do anything to ruffle the girlfriendís jealous feathers. God forbid he should stand up to her and state that I am his ex-wife, friend and the mother of his daughter. And that if he wanted to watch my dog, too damn bad, if you donít like it, thereís the door. I said, ďSo, youíre just gonna kiss her ass and be a pussy then?Ē
12/24 Direct Link
Traveling on Christmas Eve. This is a first. Naturally, it couldnít go perfectly smoothly. The first flight was right on time and all went well. I arrived in Dallas at just a little past noon. I had over 3 hours before my next flight, so I grabbed a burger and a couple of beers. I walked over to my gate only to find it had been changed to another gate and delayed. Then it was on to yet another gate and delay. I finally arrived in Shreveport approximately 2 hours late. The best laid plans just do not cooperate sometimes.
12/25 Direct Link
I called while sitting in my rental car at the end of the street. I didnít want to show up unannounced on his doorstep on Christmas Day. He answered. I asked him how he was doing. He said he was doing all right, as well as can be expected. I sensed he was unsure as to whom he was speaking. I told him. He told me to come on over. It was a good time. As I walked up the drive, my heart was pounding and the tears started to flow. I buried my face in his chest and sobbed.
12/26 Direct Link
When I first arrived, the sun was shining and the weather was beautiful. It seemed as though California had followed me to my hometown. Then, today, the rain started. Thunder roared and lighting crackled and the earth was drenched in sweet water. I sat at my motherís and watched the rain fall all day long. I wanted to go to Cindy Sueís, hang out with her and drink beer, laugh and cut up as I usually do when Iím in town. But this was not meant to be. I will never again visit with my beloved friend. Life sucks sometimes!
12/27 Direct Link
My hometown has practically become a Ghost Town. Businesses that used to be thriving when I lived there are now boarded up and closed. I met a couple of my friends from school for a beer at the local Mexican restaurant. We had a couple of cold ones and I stated that if I am drinking, I would rather be in a bar atmosphere. We headed to the Sports Grill at the other end of town. It was closed. ďAnywhere else we could go?Ē I asked. ďNot really,Ē they replied. What? No bar hopping in Rayville? You gotta be kidding?
12/28 Direct Link
After returning to Rayville from taking my little brother to the train station in Jackson, MS, I decided to go check out the one bar I knew was in town. Itís a dive. Thatís probably why my friends didnít want to go there on Thursday night. I have no snobby bones in my body and I assumed I would see someone I knew. I did. All grade school, junior high and freshman year classmates. One in particular caught my eye and curiosity. I hadnít seen him in over 30 years. We spent the night together at a motel in town.
12/29 Direct Link
I woke up this morning with Good Ole Boy. I tried all night to picture him when he was young and I couldnít muster up an image. He has changed as we all have. He has lost the hair on top of his head but still has hair around the sides. Me and a baldy! Who woulda thunk it? His smile was bright and lit up his face. We talked half the night. He told me that Cindy Sue was his first kiss. It made me feel warm knowing that. I wanted to be around people with connections to her.
12/30 Direct Link
I am so tired from my trip. I swear I could climb into bed and not crawl out for a whole week! I love to go home for a visit, but it is a hassle traveling. I did enjoy my stay. I saw people I havenít seen in over 30 years. Good Ole Boy was one. I went to school with him through my freshman year in high school. When I transferred to the private school in town, I lost touch with many of my public school classmates. It was nice to touch base with that group on this trip.
12/31 Direct Link
New Yearís Eve. Not going out to party tonight. First, a hot bubble bath is in order. Then I will stop by Chiliís for a cold beer and a visit with Missy. Watching her work is priceless! ďThanks for coming, have a great night!Ē she yells to customers as they walk out the door. I smile. My girl. Then, itís off to Sushi with Half-pint. Great Saki, food and friendship. Finally, I go by Jules, jump in her SUV and Iím off to the airport to pick up my friends. Champagne toast before and after midnight end the evening perfectly!