BY thefish

10/01 Direct Link
Oh My God!!! This date couldn’t have gone better. We hit it off exactly as I assumed we would. He really is 6 foot 8 inches tall. He’s also just as cute in person. I was worried about his size. Sometimes men who are almost freakishly tall are also blubbery. He said he was built like a tight end in football or a power forward in basketball. He was not kidding!!! He also liked the way I had described myself and he was not disappointed in the least. In fact, after meeting in person, he’s even more attracted to me.
10/02 Direct Link
I have a confession to make. I let him sleep over. We did the deed. I had a long talk with my Gentle Giant on the pier about my history with first dates from the internet. I'm a little jaded and afraid to trust. He was so sweet and convincing that he truly wanted to see me again and I wouldn't get a "Dear Jane" e-mail the next day that I buckled. No less than five friends advised me not to have sex with him. Did I listen to them? No. Time will tell if I made the right decision.
10/03 Direct Link
I didn’t get a Dear Jane e-mail today. Instead I got more of the same. Samples of e-mails from my Gentle Giant: “Dear Sweet Beautiful “Fish” “TTYL, sweetheart” "Dear Moaning “Fish” with the Massive Mammories” “Dear “Fish” with the Beautiful Big Boobs” Always ending the mail with lots of XXXXXX’s and a few OOO’s. Says he can hardly think of anything else since our date. Says he can’t wait to see me again and look into my beautiful blue eyes, kissing me, holding me and making love to me. This is too good to be true. Waiting for the fall.
10/04 Direct Link
Tragedy strikes: As I was taking my beloved Bo out for his nightly walk, I stepped on a pine cone and twisted my foot. At first I didn't think it was that serious and was able to finish Bo's walk and get back up the stairs to my apartment. As the minutes passed, the pain grew worse. Eventually I was crawling around on the floor and crying from the pain. I couldn't put any weight on it. I contacted Gentle Giant and asked if he could come over. "Put ice on it," he replied. Cold response. Odd. What the Fuck?
10/05 Direct Link
The diagnosis is in. I had the Prodigal Son take me down to the emergency room at the local hospital. Thank God for insurance. My foot by now has a huge bruise on the top right side. I can't curl my toes or put any weight on it. After the X-rays, the doctor comes in with the news I expect to hear. Fracture. I broke my fucking foot! After being given pain killers and being splinted, the Prodigal Son takes me home and waits on me hand and foot. Who would have thunk it? Him taking care of me. Pricesless!
10/06 Direct Link
What is happening? I confess when I was crawling around on the floor in agony after the physical fall, I sent my Gentle Giant texts and e-mails explaining what had happened and asked if he could come over. After all, I deduce he could pick me up and carry me around. He pretty much just gives me the cold shoulder. Then I get mail last night. He’s sorry to hear I hurt my foot, but “Do me a favor. Give me a day to two to think.” Yeah, think about how you are going to word your Dear Jane e-mail.
10/07 Direct Link
I have been laid up for the past two days in my apartment. My dear friend Half-Pint tells me she’s working at the Pub for football Sunday. She says if I can get a ride to the Pub, she will give me a ride home. I can sit and watch football and my beloved Angels all day and visit with friends. Of course, the story of the day was my foot. “A pine cone?” everyone asks. I know…I wish it could have happened in a more creative way like having awesome sex and falling off the bed!!! My story’s boring.
10/08 Direct Link
The emotional fall: I got the e-mail I’d expected. Now that he’s had time to think about everything, he feels it’s probably a good idea that we don’t see each other again. He sensed from some things I said in my last messages that I was looking for more of an LTR, seeing each other 2 to 3 times a week. He’s not looking for that right now and to save me from being hurt later, it would be better to end it now. I’m still beautiful, great, etc. but he’s not looking for anything serious. Blah, blah, fucking blah!!!
10/09 Direct Link
After the Dear Jane e-mail, I replied and expected that to be that. I’ve never heard from anyone else again. This time, I got a response. Then I responded back. Back and forth until now we have a second date. I’m so confused. I have no clue about men anymore. If he’s not a player and he’s really a nice guy, why would he do that to me after I had told him about my miserable history with internet dating? If he still wanted to see me, but just slow things down a little, why not just say that? Curious.
10/10 Direct Link
My Gentle Giant came over tonight. He brought beer, chips and salsa. He genuinely felt bad about his reaction to my injury. He assumed I just twisted it and it wasn’t serious. As he stood in my apartment watching me hobble around on my crutches, I could see the anguish in his eyes. We watched a funny movie as I sat with my legs thrown across his leg, laughing, while he had him arm around me rubbing my back. We had a little discussion before anything went further. I think this one might work out but I’m afraid to hope.
10/11 Direct Link
While my Gentle Giant was over, there came a time when I had to go to the bathroom. As I started to reach for my crutches, he stood up, said “No you don’t,” and proceeded to lift me in his arms while I wrapped my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck. As he carried me, I kissed his neck with the sweetest kisses. Later, when he was carrying me to the bedroom, he stopped at the kitchen counter and sat me down. I was eye to eye with him as he kissed me. Fantasies come true!
10/12 Direct Link
I finally feel comfortable enough with my boot on to try and drive. I go to my car and it is dead as a doornail. I call AAA and they send a tow truck to jump my car. When my car comes to life, I roll off into the night. After a drive to another town and back, I stop at the store and go inside for no more than 10 minutes. I return to my car and it is dead again. After being jumped again, I drive home and find my car will not start again. New battery. Shit!!!
10/13 Direct Link
My Sweet Missy. You are all grown up. Where did the time go? I rarely get to see you these days since you’ve been living with Daddy. I know you are busy with your friends, high school and your job. I can’t believe you’re driving! I’m so glad you felt comfortable enough to call me the night you lost your virginity. I knew it had to happen sooner or later. Anytime you need to talk about anything, all you need to do is call and I’ll be there to hold you while you cry or laugh until we cry together.
10/14 Direct Link
Hot! Hot! Hot! The Gentle Giant and I were texting up a storm tonight. He sent a message to me regarding the Saints game. I commented that I was watching the game naked in bed. He text back a devilish little comment, then I text back an equally devilish comment…back and forth it went. In the end of our little personal conversation we both had to take care of some business, if you know what I mean. He still hasn’t set a time for our next date but I hope it’s soon. I can’t wait to see him again.
10/15 Direct Link
Shit!!! I caught a nasty cold from a friend. He was just doing me a favor by giving me a ride to the Pub and back last Tuesday and he had a cold. By Thursday night, I had a stuffy nose. By Friday, my nose was runny and the back of my throat tickled and felt awful. By the weekend, it had settled into the back of my throat and I coughed up phlegm constantly. By today it had settled in my chest and it rattles when I cough. No work for me today. RULE: We can’t bring germs in.
10/16 Direct Link
The Gentle Giant has grown a little quiet. I thought I was going to get the brush off again. He sent mail that indicated otherwise, but it was still short. I haven’t had a wordy e-mail in a few days. I don’t believe I will ever understand men. How does one go from really, really liking (pretending?) me to hardly speaking to me. I just don’t get it. He is not looking for anything serious right now. What does that mean? I do not understand how men can control their emotions so easily. You either feel something or you don’t.
10/17 Direct Link
My place is a freaking mess! I look around and see Bo’s hair on the carpet. I see dishes piled in the sink. I see trash needing to be taken out. I see floors that need sweeping and mopping. I see a mountain of clothes growing daily on my closet floor. Since I broke my foot, I have been unable to keep up with the housework. I hate it!!! I like a neat place. I like a clean place. The Prodigal Son is supposed to be helping, but his lackluster cleaning skills leave a lot to be desired. It stinks!
10/18 Direct Link
All righty then. The Gentle Giant is back. I am not going to make mistakes with this guy. I will not question him on why I haven’t heard from him or why his e-mails have gotten short on substance. I promised him I wouldn’t get clingy or expect more from him than he is willing or wants to give. I will keep that promise. I don’t want to scare this one off. He is everything I’ve ever dreamed of in a man. Tall, hair, cute, hot body, great sense of humor, genuinely nice, affectionate, passionate. He’s got it all! Nice!!!
10/19 Direct Link
The owl spread his awesome wings and soared through the air. He swooped down into the bushes beyond my balcony. His beautiful white face was shining in the evening sun. “Hoo Hoo,” the Prodigal Son cried from the patio door. The owl looked puzzled as he turned his face toward the call. The owl is a beautiful creature. I wonder if this owl is a resident in my community. I look for him every day now. I hope he visits again. Maybe some of his wisdom will rub off on me. One can only hope! I could use some wisdom!
10/20 Direct Link
The little black ball of fur with the wisps of gray hair intermingled in the black greets me at the door every day. He is always so excited and happy to see me. He jumps up at the leash hanging on the wall waiting for me to go for it. He loves for Mommy to take him out for his daily walks. When we arrive home, I sit in my easy chair and he jumps up and lies down beside me, snuggled next to my legs. With a friend like Bo, what do I need a man for? Just sex.
10/21 Direct Link
I slept in until 10:30 this morning. I turned on the TV to watch the football games. After I saw that my beloved Saints won, I fell into an afternoon slumber. I don’t nap very often and this nap was good. I rose at 4:30 and decided to head to the pub to watch the Broncos and the Boston Red Snots. I was disappointed that the Snots won. They beat my beloved Angels and I wanted to see the Indians go to the WS. After dinner and couple of beers, it was home for the rest of my lazy day.
10/22 Direct Link
Last year, I bought a nurse’s uniform for my Halloween costume. The uniform was tight, short and squished my boobies. In the meantime, I had just broken up with Philly Blue Eyes and he had moved into the neighbor’s apartment down the hall. I was trying on the costume when he came knocking. He was incensed! How could I be so disrespectful to him and go out looking like a slut? This year, after some weight loss, it fits perfect. And no jealous ex-boyfriend to stop me! Nurse Fish will be out and about looking smoking hot!!! I love Halloween!
10/23 Direct Link
My Gentle Giant and I were supposed to have a date tonight. I had to cancel on Sunday due to the dreaded monthly visit by the Great Crimson God. Sucks! I wanted to see him so bad. He reassured me that we would see each other soon, hopefully this weekend or the first of next week. I know some women who have no problem having sex during their monthly mayhem, but I don’t like too. I like to be completely uninhibited during sex. I know some men who don’t mind either. But I mind. That is what counts, after all.
10/24 Direct Link
The hills of California are aglow with fires burning everywhere. The ash falls from the sky like snow on a hot day. The sky is filled with a hazy glaze that makes the sun look more orange than usual. The air fills my nostrils with an acrid odor that I usually only enjoy when a fire is blazing in the fireplace on a cold winter’s night. It is a horrible thing to lose your house to fire. The fire consumes everything in its wake. I am so relieved that I don’t live near enough for my home to be threatened.
10/25 Direct Link
Here we go again. I haven’t heard from my Gentle Giant since Tuesday afternoon. I have sent two e-mails and one picture text and have gotten no response. He assures me that he wants to see me again. He says he can’t wait to make all my fantasies come true. The last mail I received began “Hi my Beautiful Angel.” And, now, nothing. I hope everything is all right with him. I refuse to ask why I haven’t heard from him. I am just biting my lip and biding my time. I hate not having any control over the issue.
10/26 Direct Link
I got a text from Dracula on Monday night. I declined. The Prodigal Son arrived home and proceeded to get on my nerves. I text Dracula and offered a great blow job and all I asked in return was snuggling. He jumped at the chance. I spent an hour and a half with him. Hard to believe we’re still doing this after two years. He said I could come over and do the same thing for the next fifty years and he would be satisfied. I said if I’m still coming over at 97 then I would kill myself! Ha!!!
10/27 Direct Link
The Halloween Party at the Pub was tonight. I donned the nurse’s uniform I purchased last year but never got to wear. It fit to snug last year, but after a bit of weight loss recently, it fit perfect except in the chest area. I wore a white lace bra and unzipped it so that the bra was showing and the tug around my boobies was not quite as tight. I walked in and all heads turned. It appears I make one heck of a sexy nurse. I was beating them off with a stick before the night was over.
10/28 Direct Link
The Gentle Giant and I were burning up the text lines again this afternoon. We had a delightful time taunting back and forth about his Rams and my Saints. He said the Rams were going to make some gumbo stew when they host the Saints in two weeks. I said the gumbo stew would be made by the Saints and they’ll use Ram meat. We have a date to watch the game together. Other than that, it was more teasing leading up to our date on Monday night. This one is a keeper. I enjoy everything about him so far.
10/29 Direct Link
He arrived with gifts in hand. One bottle of wine, one six-pack of beer, two containers of strawberries and one can of whipped cream. After we said our hellos and poured a glass of wine, he kissed me for a long time. He lifted me onto the kitchen counter and that’s when the fun began. Not long after, I was covered in strawberry juices and whipped cream. He licked it off little by little. It was a delightful kitchen experience. Later, we lay in bed watching television and having pleasant conversation. This was one night that I will never forget!
10/30 Direct Link
Half-pint was working at the Pub today. Any time she is working, I have no tab. Works well for me and my budget! The Coronas can get mighty expensive after a few, considering they are never offered at a special rate for Happy Hour. Since I have helped Half-pint with several issues over the past year, she serves me for free. The Pub was busy with pals and other patrons. It’s always fun to go in and see my friends and have a beer or two. The Fireman was there. He’s always good for a shot or two of Jack.
10/31 Direct Link
Halloween just isn’t what it used to be for me. My little goblins are all grown up. No more carving pumpkins. I miss the creativity but I decidedly do not miss the mess. No more making costumes. I miss the creativity but I decidedly do not miss the time and effort spent. No more decorating. I miss the creativity but I decidedly do not miss the cleaning up after. This year I did nothing. No pumpkins, no costumes, no decorating and no trick-or-treaters at the door. I have a bowl full of candy I get to keep all to myself.