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I walked barefoot on the sidewalk, as it rained tonight. The sensation of the cold rain trickling down my face, rolling across my neck, cascading between my breasts, felt liberating... I wanted to strip all my clothing off and allow my flesh to become wet and saturated. As I took a step forward, water squished like liquid tongues between my toes. I relished each step back to my front porch. I've never made love in the rain before... Mmmmmmm...The thought my sucking his thrusting cock in the rain is arousing... I bet he would cum like thunder...................................................................................I would.
My Dearest Iquana Zen, Master of many languages and symbols. I bow before you in gratitude for your friendship, words of wisdom, and your encouragement. On the day I had felt my sacred space had been violated, you sent me the most beautiful E-mail, celebrating our completing the month of April. When I told you I wouldn't be posting anymore, you spoke from the heart, reminding me how inspiration comes in many guises, even in my raw and gutsy writings. I've decided I'm President of your fan club. With great admiration, Your Highness, The Goddess Quanita. This month's for you....
As we admired the beautiful bodies in the porno magazine, I kept thinking, at 44 yrs. young, how could I compare to them? In the back of my mind, I will always know, it's that type of beauty he is seeking as his Beloved, which causes me great sadness...because he doesn't recognize me. Yet deep within my heart is the power to resurrect his penis...
something no ordinary mortal could have done...
My heart heals his wounds...and even then, he doesn't like what he sees, because I'm not "perfect." Will he ever "see" who I AM? I'm Cristina.
I wanted to come so badly...the energy kept building and building...I was riding a wave of desire, that crested, but wouldn't release...Voices spoke, "Trust us. You must trust him...Allow the twins to be as one..." I held my head to his heart, gripping him for dear life..."LET ME COME..." A force, so powerful, held me in place. I heard our hearts beating in synch...merging into one...echoing throughout time... undeniable love coursing throughout my body, taking my breath away... and when I couldn't hold the energy any longer...I collapsed...and all was still.
Sometimes I think I'm broken. I believe he can fix me. He's just got to use the right tools. Lord knows he has tried his best, but I know what's missing...so does he. I found that part inside of him that was missing, in my heart, with patience he was healed. I'm told he will do the same for me, but if I'm not the desire of his heart, how can he?
Love will heal me.
I'm thinking about disappearing for a while..................that way, he isn't obligated to fix me... Out of sight, out of mind...you know?
Immersed in melancholy, I had an epiphany. "I want to be THE most specialist one." I deserve that, don't I? Doesn't everyone? I'm holding the vision that it'll manifest in this lifetime. One day, a man, who takes my breath away, and is worthy of my love, affection, gifts, and companionship, will see the blessing my presence is in his life, will "know" how very beautiful, and wonderful I AM. He will hold me tenderly, and state,
"I AM in love with you. You are THE most specialist one."
And our adventures, happiness, and passion will be "ALL THAT IS."
The signs are everywhere, and impossible to ignore, even when we escape, like two children playing hooky. Today, it was a beautiful, old, cedar tree, with twin trunks. Upon inspection of the tree, we were delighted to see male and female genitalia formed by it's majestic branches. It was quite erotic! It reminded me of his six foot tall frame, standing on top of a dining room chair, while I stood naked sucking his delicious penis. God I love to hear that man ROAR, as he releases his warm cum into my hungry mouth! I love sharing heaven with him.
My vibrator broke, right when I was ready to climax...Talk about bad timing!!! So it was necessary for me to do some EMERGENCY shopping at the Toy Store today. A woman NEEDS to take care of her B U S I N E S S. After comparative shopping, I decided to invest in a ribbed pyrex phallus, a vibrating, anal plug, and THE cutest little - yet powerful - silver bullet. I'm looking forward to playing with my toys, but you know how it goes, sometimes it's so much better to share your toys with a friend. I wonder if I can find someone to play with me...?
"...Tell me you will never leave...oh I'll just try to make believe...that everything, everything, everything, you tell me is true...Lie to me...." Johnny Lang voice is so sexy. Dancing within the circle of crystals seductively, while listening to his cd, was very erotic. My girlfriend Mona said she was hypnotized by the sparks and energy that were emanating from my fingers and body. We both agree, when one stands in the circle, the energy is so arousing. And oh the visions I see inside, of the future with My Beloved, are better than
porn I've seen.
I'm on a quest for the ultimate orgasm, convinced that it is not possible without love. Anyone can randomly fuck...but what is that really? I don't want "a" moment...I want an odyssey of pleasure and passion... Deep within me a ravenous hunger consumes my thoughts and being. What I want/need is right before me, but I don't know how to access it. I'm in blissful heat. My veins burn with an inextinguishable desire. My senses aroused by all beings I come in contact with. I see their fantasies, smell their lust...taste their erotic palates. MY TURN.
It was 9 p.m. My students were happy...No one wanted to leave the workshop tonight. It'd been a wonderful day, filled with magick, laughter, and healing. In my car I checked my cell phone for messages. My heart broke as my sister spoke through the tears.
"I'm calling to tell you I love you. I'm going to kill myself now..."
Frantic phone call...
Pick up the phone...
Pick up the phone...
God please let her pick up the phone...
Please, oh please...oh pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....
PICK UP THE PHONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A stranger's voice...cryptic words..."...pills...no pulse...not breathing..."
I understand what my sister is feeling...The emptiness...The void. I've been at the same checkout point several times. If not for my beloved friends, I would've cashed in my chips long ago, and called it a day; but if I would've done that, I would've missed so much!!! If someone told me I would be capable of loving a man, as much as I love him, I would've shaken my head in disbelief...and yet I do...
I love him.
I love as I've loved
other man. He's my breath, my life, my purpose. He's My Twinkie.
No one could ever replace you... Do you know that? I've looked at thousands of men's souls, searching to see if I've missed something...someone...but the only thing I miss is
You're the one who takes my breath away. Even if you were 500 pounds, hairless, with one eye...I'd know it was you, and still I'd love you with all my heart. Yesterday, you were loving me... It was heaven to snuggle with you...Paradise to taste your throbbing flesh...and still I crave more... Tonight, I hold you in my arms, as we breath as one.
"So what's new with you?" Lita asked mischievously...
"The question is...What's new with you Lita?!!! Your face tells me you are up to something
naughty." I cajoled. Leaning forward she whispered, "I got my nipples pierced, wanna see?!" Giggling we both dash into the Starbucks restroom, where she eagerly lifts her blouse, exposing her saucy, sweet, breasts. Sure enough, her nipples were pierced. "So what do you think? Do you like them? Should I get implants? Because if you tell me no, I won't..." she implored... I examined her breasts closely, "Lita, they're pretty... Implants would ruin perfection."
We sat embraced in that sacred space; he in front of me, as I wrapped my arms and legs closely around him from behind. It was heaven to snuggle my head against his back. Pressed together, we became a cocoon of divine light. Our hearts felt full. Changing positions, I knelt before him, laying my head on his lap. As he stroked my hair, I felt his penis pressing against his trousers, and rising against my cheek... I desired to taste him, so he arose, and proudly released his engorged penis, sliding it lovingly into my warm mouth to suckle.
My friend and I decided to run an unusual experiment. We synchronized taking female Viagra Herbal Supplements, to see how it affects our bodies. Supposedly the effects kick in within 25 minutes, and last for 12 hours. Here's what we're experiencing after 1 1/2 hours: 1) HOT FLASHES. We both feel like stripping off our clothes just to cool off. 2) Our faces are beet red and flushed. (Maybe the blood is flowing to the wrong parts of our bodies. We should stand on our heads to increase effectiveness.) 3) Our throat's feel pretty perky... 4) We both feel gassy...
In the healing light of love, I opened my tear filled eyes, and saw his beautiful, brown eyes, looking directly into mine. I saw
Sitting on an old wooden bench, we basked in the radiance of the noonday sun, as it filtered through the circle of trees, our bodies snuggled against one another... It was
Today was one of THE happiest days of my life. Total
It doesn't seem right that we should ever be separated from one another. The void would be too great. Together, we are
I can't deny he's My Universe... My
"What is it you want child?"
I want to be loved.
"Then listen dear child, listen..............
Every infant that's born into your world comes in with their arms and hearts wide open, ready to receive love. Sadly, so many infants are born into spaces where the true meaning of love has been lost, many of those dear infants learn to survive in harsh, abusive environments, and sadly, many don't survive. You have survived for a reason and purpose that's divinely ordained and orchestrated...to love...to be loved...to demonstrate love...........to show the way..."
I want to know love.
The inquiring eyes of wisdom looked directly into mine and asked, "Do you love him?" "I do." I replied. "Never forget that." she said, lovingly embracing me and whispering, "Thank you."
I could never deny that I love him, because I do.
I understand why they don't want me to forget that...They want us to be together, so I can love him...fully...completely...and stand by his side...
When we're together, our hearts are full, and we're so happy.
It IS heaven.
the naughty things I want to do to that delicious man.............................again, and again.........................................
The seven hour drive home wasn't unfamiliar to me, so I ignored the slew of concerned phone calls to pull over and stay the night at a hotel. As always, I prayed, asking God/ess to send angels to help me drive home safely. The rain poured in sheets. My windshield wipers were going as fast as they could, but still I kept driving forward.... Three hours into the drive, two HUGE black horses appeared to the left of my vehicle with two riders wearing long black leather coats and stetson hats. They looked like Clint Eastwood with luminescent, black wings.................................
...........................I shook my head, blinking my eyes quickly to see if it was a hallucination, but it wasn't. They looked over their shoulders at me and pointed upwards to the right of me, that's when lightning struck illuminating the dark night, and I saw a tornado headed right for me. "HOLY SHIT BATMAN!!! I'm going to die!!!!!!!!!!!!!" They beckoned for me to keep moving forward, and although my car was driving at least 75 mph, it seemed their horses and my vehicle were motionless... Terrified I watched the tornado as it headed right for me. It sounded like a train..........................................
...............Were these riders Angels of Death?!!!! I asked God to PLEASE take care of My Children, Friends, and My Beloved Twinks......Let them know how much
I love them.
Just as the tornado should've lifted my vehicle, the riders put up their hands, in a stopping motion, causing the tornado to move away from me. Devastation from the tornado lay ahead of me. Trucks and cars were overturned and twisted every which way..... It was horrific!!!! An angelic voice said, "DON'T STOP...It isn't safe..." The riders urged me to keep moving, staying ahead of me until I reached home.
I can see their hearts beating beneath their expensive suits. I can taste their desires. I'm hungry for pleasure. My eyes lick their fantasies... They follow me like eager puppy dogs, who have caught the scent of a bitch in heat....
I don't want them.
I WANT YOU. Moist, honey nectar, glistens upon the sweet pink petals between my legs... Taste me. Trace your cock outside my velvet orifice... Make me squirm with pleasure. I'm waiting for you. Here. Now. I want to suck you dry, and watch you swell for more. It's not polite to keep a Goddess waiting.......
Sitting across from him wasn't uncomfortable, but it was clearly apparent to me how different our vibrations are. He seemed happier than I've seen him in a long time. This made me smile. He deserves to be happy, so do I. He wants to reunite, but only if I "be" who he deems "appropriate and acceptable."
I WILL NOT DO THAT.
Sharing one hour with him validated the importance of not going back to the emptiness, the void. As horny as I'm feeling, the thought of having sex with him made me want to vomit. I've made the right choice.
His presence was very important to me. It was a monumental night. Oh if I could only put into words how much he means to me, for he is every breath I breathe, every heart I touch, every moment of heaven. I wondered if he would be proud. I was so frightened. Is it possible he could love me exactly as I am, and not be embarrassed or ashamed to be associated with me? When my eyes truly opened, there he was sitting next to me smiling. My fragile heart filled, and I was so grateful....so very, very, grateful.
Come with me to the treehouse...I want to play. I'll let you go first if you want, or we could take turns. Don't worry, all our secrets are safe here, as is our hearts. There are two chicklets in the treasure chest, one for me, one for you. Look out the window, do you see how beautiful our horizon is? Snuggle with me. Let me feel the warmth of your skin next to mine...Mmmmm...You always smell so good.
God I love you.
I figured it out, you know...
Heaven is the treehouse.
Please don't ever let go...
"Don't break the Twinkie Trust."
he said. I've been pondering that statement for hours........God that man intrigues me.... I could sit for hours mesmerized by his expressions of consciousness. Sometimes I just stare at his lips...I like how the lower lip pokes out a bit...It looks so sweet...I want to
....... And those "
IQ" words he uses, turns me the heck on....Like "CUNNILINGUS"...You should see how that rolls off his tongue.
I won't. I won't break the Twinkie Trust...We will Twinkie Swear on it ASAP...
Hey Twinks, let's never grow up.
I can't help it I tell ya! One minute I'm snuggling his chest, listening to his heartbeat; the next minute I'm fondling his flawless genitals... There's something magick about the way his penis rises to my touch... Pretty soon I'm going down on him and jacking him off... I LOVED every minute of it!!! I loved watching him tremble... I loved the sounds of pleasure... I loved how he thrust into my hungry mouth... I loved the taste of his cum... I loved licking him clean. AND I want to do it again and again... Why?!!! Because I love him.
Show me those hands one more time...That's right...Work magick with those skilled fingers...Smooth circular motions...then a slide up...slide down....Do it again...Nice and slow...One finger is nice, two is delicious...Mmmmmmm....that's right...around and around...now make me squirm...You know the quickest way...or maybe you'll take me on the scenic route...Am I paying attention, you ask? Oh yes...I certainly am...but just in case...show me one more time...I like how you know exactly where I am...and how your fingers escort me to where I'm going...
10:36 p.m., I was driving home, totally focused on the road, when all of a sudden this INCREDIBLE energy surged into my heart, spreading like liquid passion throughout my body, flowing straight into my clitoris. WHAM!!!!!! I was enjoying
first spontaneous orgasm of my life. Wave after wave of delicious release coursed through me. I gripped the steering wheel, praying for a red light. Uninhibited sounds of bliss released from the core of my being...and I called out his name with abandon, claiming creation. He did it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm in awe.
Bravo! The student has indeed become the Master.
Thomas was surly, watching me from between the bars, challenging me to touch him. Respecting his space, I addressed him from a distance, and walked away, to which he stuck up his nose indignantly. Little Loni pushed up against the bars, desperate for affection. I reached down and petted her soft, white fur. "Meow." she said. Then there was the BIG, Cheshire Cat, who matched my gaze, as if he was checking me out. They all wanted to be free...to be loved...to be adopted into a good home...individual personalities, characteristics, body types, and all... Just like me.
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