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05/01 Direct Link
I can't believe how long Matt made me wait to do this. It must have been twenty minutes. I am so curious how Jeff and Ory's reading went. I guess I'll find out. I keep forgetting how much it sucks to write in word pad. It's got so little options. I kan't even spell check, or word count. This is almost as bad as Bank Street Writer.

On to a much more serious matter. It's almost twelve and I still can't believe what a great episode of Buffy it was tonight. Willow fighting Glory was so hot. Three more episodes.
05/02 Direct Link
Wow. One hundred words, it goes by in the course of one thought, or maybe less.

Been working on a poem. First one in a long time. Here is my first rough. I still don't have a third stanza. I'm working it.

Sati

The crowd roars
As I make my entrance
I am a hero
Immortal
I want everyone to know I died with my love intact
The writhing hands hold me up
This is my choice

Flip
Flip
Flip
I go over the top
A perfect circle
As I stand on the seat I know I will never die
05/03 Direct Link
Not as tired as I feared. I Stayed up till 1am downloading stuff from my newsgroups and listening to MP3's. I really have to try to get more sleep. I wonder what Jeff and Ory were fighting about. I can only imagine it was about money. It always seems to be the lack of money that gets people crazy. I've got to go by BUCCS with my installment payment. I wonder if they will be able to get my creditors to stop charging the extra fees. They said it would be a few months. This could go on for years.
05/04 Direct Link
GbV GBV GbV. Back to Saturn X. Got home 2:30. Smoked a joint with Ray at Snakemonkey. Got to remember to e-mail that friend of Henry. Oh, yeah, GBV. Must have to been my 26, 27th GbV show. Oh man is the Soft Rock Renegades material dull. The Airport 5 was a bit better still not too exciting. It was fun seeing them do those Suitcase songs. That and the look on Bryan's face as that chick was grinding on him. He couldn't get away fast enough. She was hot, and Matt was more than happy to take his place.
05/05 Direct Link
Another GBV show @ Irving Plaza. It must be the 10, or 11 time I've seen them there. Went with Matt, Jeff, and Ory. Jeff and Ory gave us a ride home. They had the windows down and were screaming at anything they saw. Got back AC's cranking. Had some ice tea and went to bed. No real surprises in the set list. The Jeffrey Pumpernickel guy sang with Bob. They did that song from the record. It was like having a time machine. It reminded me how pro Robert has become. GbV lacks a bit of fire these days.
05/06 Direct Link
OK, so it's been about three maybe four years since I wrote seriously on a regular basis. Not since I was taking that Blake class with Alan Ginsburg, I don't even know if I can spell his name right any more. That would be a help if I had a sense of time. I think it was around the time Matt brought his ‘72 Star to the guitar convention and we got that Vox Tonebender that got destroyed in the flood at the folk's house. That's when they first made the Tremadillo(?) pedal, and they had those beautiful Bruno Combo's
05/07 Direct Link
BUFFYBOT
…Anya! How's your money?
ANYA
Fine! Thank you for asking.

I am so excited about what's going on with Buffy. I downloaded a whole bunch of season 2 today and yesterday. I'm starting to understand why some people prefer the long hair willow to the more recent short hair version. On a different note I have to get on Matt to give me those one-sheets for the new discs. We can't solicit without them. It's taking too long. I looked at the 100-word beta site. I almost feel like I should be saying something profound, but not really.
05/08 Direct Link
"Why are you dancing into me"?

I overheard Phyllis saying that to her daughter. I don't know what that means. God is it boring today. Typed a "U" rating report, did some copying and filing. I wonder if I should take the Clerical Associate test, and go permanent civil service. I was always a big Pekar fan. He said to go and take the test. A guaranteed job with benefits is a real comfort especially with all the layoffs. Can't wait for Matt to get back so we can finally get to work on promoting the new cd's. More later.
05/09 Direct Link
Glory

The trees are singing water.
A twig snaps nearby.
Shiny.
Pretty little girl. She's shiny too.
All shiny. Pretty little Key.
Pretty little shiny girl...

It's so pretty. Can I have one?
All the light... gone
...dark....... all dark ...

Horsies!
Time! Time! Time!
Time... time...
It's time! It's time!
Wriggling.

I "wrote" this by taking lines from this weeks Buffy "Spiral." I'm not sure if I want to edit it or not. All the lines except for line two are from Tara, or Orlando after being brainsucked by Glory. Might cut lines 1, and 5 from stanza 3.
05/10 Direct Link
Yesterday was mess. Matt was stuck in Lake Placid and we ran out of money. I was running to the bank and leaving messages on his phone he couldn't get because he was in a dead zone. He got lucky and got on the train. We still haven't paid the rent or paid our dad back for covering for last month. I've got my monthly payment to BUCCS, and the IRS will be garnishing part of my paycheck for another three months, and I haven't paid this years taxes for my self or my business. It makes you hate.
05/11 Direct Link
Victor's meat market, I must have walked past that place on the corner of E. 1st and 13th st. at least 200 hundred times if not more before I went into it. It always seemed kind of dirty and grubby. Not exactly the vibe I looked for when I'm shopping for food. Especially something so prone to picking up bacteria, or other microbes like raw meat. But so far it hasn't failed wonderful T-bones, and great shell steaks. Tonite we had huge T-bones, and Vong's version of the molten chocolate cake. Almost as healing as chicken soup, and more filling.
05/12 Direct Link
NP Human Switchboard — (Say No To) Saturday's Girl

I don't know what to do with myself today. I've been reading some Old Tim Minear usenet posts. That guy can really write. Wish I had known about usenet when I was watching L&C. I also dig the X-files stuff he did. I have to check out Rayne's site for his scripts. I've been reading the Buffy stuff.

I should be studying. I've got finals in less than two weeks and I have much reading to do, but instead I'm downloading live Bad Religion from Bearshare, and reading usenet. Nothing new.
05/13 Direct Link
Oh, man was this one fucked up weekend. Starting on Saturday night. We were just planning on going downstairs to Jeff's to watch the Matrix on DVD. We got a pizza from Galleria, and had a couple of beers and the next thing I know we're doing shoots of Absinthe, and lighting huge sparklers. Matt and Jeff were throwing them against the factory across the backyard. The sparks where flying all over. Some of the ones didn't go where they supposed to and started fires. Jeff and Matt, who had shoes, stamped them out. Then Jeff wanted to visit Ory.
05/14 Direct Link
The hits just keep on coming. Today I heard one of my brother's cats is going to die. My brother's cat Caesar's kidneys are failing. He'll have to get daily saline IV for the rest of his life, which if he's lucky will be a year, a year and a half. In the past six months. He's been shaved, almost lost an eye, and gotten an enlarged heart. This just after I hear about a friend on Saturday getting wiped out by a cabs passenger opening their door. She was holding her three-year-old son. It was really bad. What next?
05/15 Direct Link
I don't know what to do. Next week will be the end of the season for many show. I know that the networks are only a portion of the tv options. But with the Sopranos ending along with all the other wonderful tv options I'm not sure how I'm going to cope. It's the hardest five months of you life. It's bad enough that the networks only buy so few shows, but with shows starting at different times, and reruns in the middle of the years. It's all too much. Well, at least there is cable to look forward to.
05/16 Direct Link
Jeff is now talking Australia. I'm starting to suspect he has no idea where he wants to go, or do except that it be far away, and not italy, because he's going there with Ory. Also it can't be somwhere he's been. It's not quite Dogma, but he definately has rules. He was going to work, and now he's not. Costa Rica, or maybe Jamacia. He was talking taking it slow, and then do the solitary writer thing, and then slow back. I can't imagine him with no one to talk to, but then again I couldn't imagine him surfing.
05/17 Direct Link
Finals are approaching with a velocity that is truly frightening. I am once again truly unprepared. This can't be an accident, well l guess it could be. I really don't want to write that paper on Medea, and I barely want to read Trstram Shandy. I'm not sure what's left except that when I'm done with that I'll almost be done with school, and I'm really not sure what comes after that. I don't see going to grade school, well it something to think about. Teachers can make $80,000 dollars a year after eight years. Who knew? Still not interested.
05/18 Direct Link
‘A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.'
-W.C. Fields

I can't believe that there is an over one hunder post thread on Alt.tv.angel on whether or not people should be expected to put spolier warnings in there headings, and spoiler space in there posts when talking about new episodes and episodes that may not have aired in other countries. You should put warnings in the headings and if you're saying a major plot point at least put in a warning at the top of the post. You give them a chance.
05/19 Direct Link
Ceasar is back. We got him from the vet hospital today. He is on a gagle of pills and injection. two hundred somthing of saline once a day. one quarter of antacid, and a quarter of antiphosphoris, and half a thyriod pill, and a heart shot once a week. He is one ill cat.

Went do to Jeff's spent all night. Watched the magnificent 7, and part of the Matrix. We made chocolate cakes, and made sure to leave a piece for Ory. We listened to discs and drank a lot of wine. Jeff ranted about consolidation of the media.
05/20 Direct Link
Just read Aristophanes Clouds. Wow was that bore. Not as bad as Plato. Justice is everyone doing what I tell them is the right thing. Yeah, glad to now that social engineering isn't a new thing.. People should do just one thing. I guess that would mean more jobs for everyone, although it would hurt the job retraining industry, and how boring would that be. But I guess the worst part of it was how fake seeming many of the convesations were. "Yes that's right," or "I believe you're correct." Just a perfunctory pause before another block of text. Dullsville.
05/21 Direct Link
Finals are on Wednesday. I have done most of my reading. I have to read almost all of Tristram Shandy, or at least enough to write my paper. I'm figuring three-four pages on the comparison between Jaques the Fatalist and Tristram Shandy will do it. Do a little bit on the narrative, and then a page on the nature of the digressions. If I can stretch it I can do a page on the types of digressions, and the use and placement of the digressions. A good enough theory I might not have to read the book at all. Right?
05/22 Direct Link
Watched the Buffy and Angel season finales. I don't know why, but as exciting as it is it's always a little bit of a letdown when the hero's win. I now that the rule is for the hero's to all ways win. For every Blakes 7, or something like that 99.999% of the time the hero's when. What else can happen? I root for the villians, because at least on American tv they don't stand a chance. They're never going to win. You have to go for the underdog. At least I do. This is a sign, but of what?
05/23 Direct Link
Oh, my god am I tired. I just finished my finals. I have no idea if I did a good job. It might have helped if I had actually done the reading. I'm really hoping that I did a good job with bullshitting my way through the eassays. I like to think I have winning way with words, and I think I made some valid points in both essays. Oh I had wanted to get back to what I said about Buffy and Angel and the whole hero villian sympathy. There is something deeply ugly about smug wisecraking hero's. Goodnight.
05/24 Direct Link
So sick so so sick that is me.
Unrest

It just doesn't feel the same. When I was young I could wake up after almost no sleep, and the fear of utter devastation would vanish, and as I would feel full energized. The devastation part would come soon after, but I was up and at ‘em. Now every morning is nauseas and headachey until I get some coffee and at least a muffin, and I got my papers done. I think I was delirious when I finished them. I was off the wall. I wrote a parody of an essay
05/25 Direct Link
It must have been Wednesday, I hadn't written my papers like I was supposed to. I was walking past my coffee guy. He asked my why if I didn't like his coffee any more.Then he asked why I hadn't come for my special order ice tea. I didn't mention it was supposed to be coffee. I told I had no money. It wasn't true, I just wanted to be able to get lunch. He says I can pay him anytime, and that I could borrow money, and I should take a muffin. I got a corn muffin and two coffees.
05/26 Direct Link
Let's try this again. The computer froze and I lost my first try. So I'm all out of sorts. I keep thinking that I have school work to do. Which is odd because I didn't feel that way when I was school this semester. I was kind of flying blind on my Core 1 final I'm pretty sure I nailed the essays. on the multiple choice I was too eager to leave to do a serious tally of the ones I know I got right. I'm going to e-mail my professors in about a week or so. Glad it's over.
05/27 Direct Link
I wonder if Glady's is completle moved out or not. I know she moved most of her stuff out. Her dressers, and coach and all of her kitchen stuff. She was here before we moved in. I think she was here before Elana. Joyce moved in the early eighties. It will be strange to have someone new move into the house. We had done a good job of creating unity in the building. Jeff, Mimi, Gladys and Joyce a good bunch of people. On monday we're having a goodbye diner. It should be cool. The last one was pretty wild.
05/28 Direct Link
This week was kind of a holding pattern. Waiting to hear about my finals, my new hours at work, my raise from the union. I'm trying to put the information together for Buccs. They wanted a bunch of new financials. I am going to ask Matt again about the writing the one-sheets. With my retroactive raise I should have money to give to Triage.

If all goes well I will be one semester, and three credits away from graduation. It it strange to think that it will be over soon. It has been the running projects of my life.
05/29 Direct Link
I am so sick. I almost threw up at Jeff's a bunch of times. I ate so much. Cabbage and noodles, deviled eggs, salsa, gucamole, chili. Later chocolate cake. We were drinking beer, and wine. Doing shoots of mataxa. Oy. After my fifth shot I was done. Tottally completle done. I nearly puked and said I was done. I had one more shot. Orianne poured me another one, but I couldn't drink it. Joyce did. And now I'm feeling it. And I don't like it much. I was thinking about calling it sick, but I won't. The weeks almost done.
05/30 Direct Link
This will be my third version due to computer freezing. Must put more ram in, and have it examined. Jeff and Orianne are moving into Gladys's apartment. They are planning on painting first. Chris was there. Very odd. Never thought I'd see him again. Always seemed like kind of a blank slate to me. Never got a handle on what kind of a guy he was. We might move into Mimi's. Have to have Matt talk to George. Jeff and Ory put up pictures from the Party very cool. Can't believe how many picture have Matt or I getting high.
05/31 Direct Link
Asked Bob about working 8-4, and he said that he needed people in the office between 4-5 and so I would have to work 9-5. I've been here for almost a year, and nothing happens between 4-5 except grievances and I doubt I'll be hearing any of those. It just doesn't make sense except that now he's changed Jilll and Joann's hours he can't let anyone work 8-4. The thing is they hear grievances and I don't. He said he might be able to do something during the summer if he gets more staff which he won't have work for.