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In the past week, my semester with HCC has been complicating and exciting. Learning to balance class and a personal life is difficult, it's like now we have to make room to have fun which I understand it's teaching us to be more responsible. As well, every college freshman is excited because now we you are matured; we transformed from a child to a young adult and now we know we've got closer to what we want to do in life. For example, we are similar; like butterflies they have 4 stages: egg, pupa, and adult. Each has a goal.
Why do people fail at being successful? Success is being happy; which some people might not be content with their self. In our generation, it's all about the money. Growing up children are teach that the world is about money; in order to survive money is the only way. For example, students get out of high school, go to college, and work at a job that's not satisfying them but the job is a 6 figure job. Now the young adult is depressed and unhappy. Being successful is about being pleased with the choices you made in life and loving what you do.
Being sad occurs when someone is feeling sorrow. Some people have different ways of making their self feel better; like food, yogurt, cakes, but nothing is like ice cream. Tasting the white smooth milky sugar frozen product makes people feel content with the problem their having. In fact, Scientists have study just a spoonful of ice cream brights the same pleasure centre in the brain as playing your favorite song or getting a car. Also it makes us forget about our breaks up with our trashy unsatisfied boyfriend. Ice cream is the resolution to the situation you are going through.
Social media are computer mediated technologies that allow the creating and sharing information, ideals, career interest, and etc. In our generation, social media has develop a lot in a negative way. For example, everybody uses instagram; which is online mobile site that allows users to share photos and videos publicly and privately. Posting those good photos and videos allows people put a filter over what's really going on in life. In other words, we are stating it's okay to post a good picture even though our life isn't really going good as the picture we took and put a filter over.
Over the years, obesity has become a more common disease In america, more than two-thirds of adults are consider overweight or obese. As a county, we have a lot of fast foods places like Burger King, Wendys, Steak n Shake; but the most common one is McDonald's. Over the years, researchers have studied eating McDonald's twice a week can cause rapid weight gain, which is the risk of developing two type of diabetes. The big juicy Big Mac that shows on the commercial is consider pink slime in the beef they are serving us to fill us up quick.
Picture this, waiting at a red light, with the sun beaming on your face, and the sweat dripping from your face. Nobody wants to image a hot sunny day, but we can image, when the clouds are start to come in and the we see a little strike of lighting; the rain is the best weather everyone feels so comfortable with. Also, when it rains, it's better opportunities to go to grocery store and don't have to wait in the long line. Like Luke Bryan would say, "Start washing all our worries down the drain, rain is a good thing."
I have been on many dates but my date with Frank was a disaster. Last friday, we agreed to go the Japaneese Steakhouse restaurant, we met there. Sitting at the table for thirty-eight minutes, he showed up. As we are eating, he starts beating his hand on table, making weird noises with his mouth, and rapping his wack raps. Embarrassedly, I got out the chair to grab my jacket, as I was took my jacket, he tried to grab my hand to pull me back; as he pulled me back I fell flat on my face. Never again never.
Have you ever felt so proud of yourself? I have, especially when I graduated. Two years ago, on May 29 @ one o'clock, at the sun dome, with all the anxiety building up, my hands sweating and my feet feeling like their are about to slide out of my shoes; I walk across the cross the stage. As all the graduates went out the back door to meet our parents, I saw my family. Looking at dad, crying tears of joy, and my mom wiping all the make-up off her face; I realized I was even more proud of myself.
This morning, at 10:35 a.m, looking at the News app on my phone, I see a story about "How to Time Your Coffee for Maximum Effectiveness". Reading the article, it stated that, coffee helps develop their memories, and gives an extra high boost. Those facts stood out to me because their are a lot of cons from drinking coffee like; risk of diabetes, gain weight, and blood pressure. A lot of questions start popping up in our head, Should we continue to ignore that fact that it gives us a lot of bad reactions or continue to drink.
Wondering why nobody won't feel no sympathy for you because you always looking for it. Out here nobody will care or want to hear what you doing through. Picture this, staying at grandmother house with mom, sisters, and brother, sleeping in one room. At night, sleeping becomes very difficult because the helicopter in the sky keeps flying around, the hard smelly dark brown carpet feel like very uncomfortable, and uncle John is crazy, takes medications, and drinks liquor like a fish. Even though, Some people go through hard times that's not the time to complain, that's when it's time grind.
You was never comfort! Boy you create a heartache and passing the blunt in rotation. I blame myself for thinking you still that boy always had a crush on me in high school, yeah I know I'm a fool. When you asked to me prom and I said no... fast forward time I gave you another chance and boy you showed your natural ass. See it's one thing to lie, but you got someone pregnant and lied to me. At times I cried, but then I remember you are not the same little boy in Mrs. Anderson class no more.
On the news, it's a commotion going on with trusting the media or Donald Trump. It's kind of funny to me because both are untrustworthy. The media makes up bogus stories or have facts to the stories and just add a little lie to make it sound good. Donald Trump stated Philadelphia murders has been increasing terribly, not true they were the third lowest last year since 1990. That shows they are both full of lies. But he is the President and the media has a large impact on today's technology. As a country, do we let this keep continuing?
Everyone has been attack verbally before, but have we been attack by the whole nation? On the news lately, there has been a lot of people saying negative things about the First Lady, Melania Trump. Before her husband, Donald Trump, spoke at the campaign rally, she opened up the rally with a prayer. After her prayer, a lot of people got on social media saying horrible things about her; one of the spokes men stated, "Melania starts a rally with the Lord's prayer, not every american is christian!" Being that she is the president's wife, people need to back off!
All these love pictures, pink and white candies, big teddy bears, and hearts balloons makes me threw up. I dislike this day, everyone has to express your perfect relationship to the world. Sadly, it's ridiculous, or it is being bitter. Seeing those love posters and big teddy bears makes me think to myself; Am I setting my values too high for men, should I go through the beatens and demands so I could feel special on the day that people express for love for another or continue to wait for the right man to love me for me with respect.
Fuck love! I gave you my heart and you broke it. But if the tables turn would you be able to take it? See, you had a chance to show me your best but you just like the rest. Founding out you gave that bitch the same kisses and hugs you gave me, is so fucking shady. So, yeah I blench your clothes and shoes, I was showing you I'm not the one to play with and I had to get the victory feeling in me. You created a mad women, all my time I put into you is wasted.
Little black girl fly. Little black girl fly. Fly so high that your dreams are at the tip of your fingers. See, no one knows what the little black girl goes through, she has cuts on her hands from the violent words of her grandparents arguing. Little black girl fly up there with the clouds because down there she is tired of her father getting locked in hands cuff and press the dials of the number five on the phone. Little black girl fly because she is running away from her problems and she wants to be somewhere in peace.
I want you to suffer for everything you did to me. You made me cry at nights, thinking to myself what did I do to you, for you to go make love to another woman. I want you to feel my pain, the pain to where you know whether to sleep on a broken heart or inhale the smoke releasing all the bullshit you out me through. This is not about love, this is about revenge. I want you to pay all me back in your sorrow of tears falling from your eyes. I'm not being bitter either, love her!
I want to be your first to go. Someone you run to when the law is after you. I want to be someone you can you tell your secrets to, like Alicia Keys do. I want to be your superwoman so I can have my "S" on chest to come save you from the all trouble. I want to be your alarm, make sure none of these dues are plotting on you. I want to your favorite! I just want to be important in your life and maybe some day us walking the aisle soon to be your wife.
Today I realized what my mom was talking about "she is not your friend, you are going to meet so many people in life you call friends", I finally got the definition. Finding out your friend is having sex with your ex is so hurtful. I couldn't even look at her nor curse her out, I felt like she had stabbed me in the heart. Having a someone you tell secrets to, did a lot of bad stuff together and knowing them for 10 years, it would never cross my mind she would sleep with my boyfriend. I blame myself.
Every girl wants a perfect amazing boyfriend. Why can't we just have someone who we can just call on, someone who can be our partner in crime, someone we can trust with our heart and money, someone we can laugh with, someone to build with, someone to go places with, someone who just generally makes you feel like you are the only he is looking at even though we are in a room full of people. A boyfriend isn't perfect and amazing, we should prefer to have someone to get old with, instead of a random boy that's a "boyfriend".
Today I got into a big argument with my father. He always tell me lies. My father thinks if he buy me something nice it will try to make up for him being absent for 10 years. I will respect him more if he tells me he is sorry. All I ever from him, him being a father. Spend time with me, call me every day to see how I'm doing, ask me for my favorite color, talk to me about what type of men you like for, and show how men love women. But I guess he wouldn't understand.
Forgiveness is the first step to moving forward, in my opinion. Carrying a baggit full of hurt will hurt you back. Forgiving someone will make you feel better because you are only forgiving them for you. If you don't forgive it will only affect you not the person who hurt you, their live is going to continue to go on, not worry about if they hurt you. But you will forever be mad because you are dwelling on the scumbag that broke your heart. Forgive them but never forget them. Let that person be your lesson. No second mistake twice.
Hearing the arguing back and forth, feeling the annoying dog lick my big toe and smell a rotten smell of eggs is not very pleasant. Is very obnoxious when my family wake up in the morning. Sometimes I wish I had my own apartment by myself and no one knew where I stayed at. But then sometimes I know I will miss having an alarm clock isn't so bad at all. Maybe having an annoying family has it pros and cons. Honestly, I may reconsider about moving out because I do sleep very hard, my mom yelling wakes me up.
Do you ever get tired of being the HERO? I know I do, it's like everyone wants you to save them, like I have a "S" on my chest. I'm not superwoman I could not save everyone day! I'm not a magician, I can't magically solve everyone problem! If I'm busy solving everyone problems, who is going to solve mine? Sometimes I wish I was mean and always said "NO" because then a person won't fix their mouth to ask an ask me something but then again maybe they are asking expected me to know, maybe I am their superwoman.
Sometimes I wish I could get away from all the headache and pain life can bring. I don't feel like I'm losing control but I just want to get away. I give people so much of me, when it's time for me to receive no one is there for me. If I was invisible no one could ask me for anything. Every time I give my all to someone, they end up breaking it. What people fail to realize is I'm not this hard rock, even though I act that way. I'm a star burst gusher, very sweet and soft.
It's 6:10 a.m., I still haven't slept. I tried to do everything I could to go to sleep; closing my eyes so tight, cutting off all the lights in the house, playing soft music, and making some warm milk. I don't know why I can't just have a peaceful sleep. I wonder if it's something I slept earlier today. If so, I learned my lesson, I can't stay up late trying to make myself sleep, it's very annoying. Hopefully, later tonight, I will be able to go to sleep by 10:00 p.m. instead of being up!
Today I'm making a big step in life, I'm going to stop smoking for 2 weeks. Now I know two weeks is not that much but I feel like I'm headed towards the right path. The reason why I want to stop, it's affecting my health. Last year, I had bronchitis, I develop it from smoking. Bronchitis is the most painful cold I ever had. Every time I cough I feel like somebody is squeezing my lungs together so tight that I can't breath. So if my choice is to stop smoking from getting this painful cold let it be.
Today I feel so horrible! My throat is so sore, and my stomach can't hold anything down. Last night I kept getting up out of my sleep throwing up nasty green mucus and running to the bathroom every fifth teen minutes. Finally, I got a trash can to put by bed because I was tired of getting out sleep to go way downstairs just to threw up. I really wish I could go in a warm cave isolated with a big comfortable blanket wrapped around me drinking some hot tea with lemons in it. Being sick as a dog stucks!
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