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June soon. July nigh. August must. September remember. October over. That was a poem that Helen taught me. She said it was an old Caribbean poem. People from the islands would say it. I miss Helly. She was so special. I think there is a lot of time that I can recall. It's not a good day today. It's the rainy season. As soon as June 1 rolled around, it became rainy every single day. I know that it's time for a cool change. It's time for a cool change. It's time for a cool change. It's time to go.
There have been a number of times that I hit the submit button and thought I wished I could get that entry back. I think that these entries are here forever are a little freaky. I coughed up a lung. That was when I was smoking. I love that saying, you don't get off until you cough. That's so funny. You're there coughing your fool head off so that's why. It's not going to be okay. I hope that you will be okay. I wish for you the best. Not until you tell me the truth will I understand you.
Would it be stupid to ask for a group hug? I don't think so. Everyone get up from your seat and let's all give each other a big old hug. How many folks are reading these words right now? None! That's because I'm still composing them. Silly goose. I'll be done shortly and then I can move on in real life. I think I have to process papers today. That's my lot in life. I have the air conditioner cranked to chilly and it's not a sunny day so the air works. I like being in my little cave today.
The weather can really affect your sense of well being. It's not good to have too many days of rainy weather. Rain is gloomy. You can tell yourself that it's exhilarating but it still can bring you down. I like that we need rain de vez en cuando, i.e., from time to time. Into every life, a little rain must fall. That's a good one. It's true too. Just get over the weather and get on with your life. Be kind. It's the only one you got. Take good care. And be oblivious to the temperature and precipitation, right?
Argh, Monday again! I don't like Monday. I wanna shoot the whole day down. Oh, get over it already. It's just another day. It happens to be the beginning of the work week. I went to work today and it was just another day. I need to go over to the community garden. I haven't been there in a very long time. And now I have two boxes since my BIL retired and went back up north. He's no longer staying down here so he doesn't have the box in the community garden. I can go crazy this growing season!
It's a rainy rainy day. Just another rainy day. It's a rainy day in the city. That's okay. I will go to work like any other day. And then I'll come home and do what? I need a project. It's time to get something going. I need to focus my energy on something because unfocused energy is not a good thing. I wonder what that means. It means it's time to get busy. Just packing those papers into bags was a good start. Now what? I need to attack closets! That's where the goblins are. It's a scary scary thought.
Or so they say. Did you notice the news on the front page? It says they're really doing something with this website. Not likely if you try to use the link to the upper right for donation. IT comes back marked user unknown. That's not good. You can't even donate! Oh well, it will soon be a new day and there will be other worries. As long as we get through the day, we'll be okay. Don't worry. Be happy. Man soon come. Monsoon here. It's been raining for five days nonstop. It's a traditional thing here in south Florida.
I can't remember, can you? It's all going to be okay. If I get out the door by 9 o'clock, I can pretty much do anything before work, but if I make it after the 9 o'clock hour, forget it! It's now 9:28 am. That means I'm in until noon time when I has to go be an administrative assistant. How the hell did I manage that? That's just queer. It's not even gay. It's just so gay, it's queer. I'm a big old queer. You big old queen. That's right, get over it. I am who I am!
What's the big deal about Friday? Oh yeah, it's the end of the work week. It means that we get two days to be slugs. Then, it's the dreaded Monday when we lather, rinse and repeat. I want to go get a corned beef sandwich but the place doesn't serve that first thing in the morning. Last time I went there, I got a corned beef sandwich, two potato pancakes and a Cel-Ray soda and it was $30. That's steep. But they are giving an extra large tip to their workers to make the place fair pay. I like.
Wow, time flies whether you're having fun or not. It's been a year since the Pulse massacre in Orlando. I wonder how many peoples' lives were changed from that one evening. Imagine if you were there and nothing really happened. You were part of it all. A nightclub. It's so dark already! And then someone starts shooting? I can't even imagine the horror. I'm glad that I wasn't there. I don't even live in Orlando, but it's scary to imagine what people did. I'm going to wrap it up with a tribute to those who died. Please be at peace.
Sunday morning and the time is softly creeping past. I've been awake since 0700 as usual. I slept all night, except for the couple of times that I got up to pee. Is that normal for a 65-year-old or do I have a prostate problem? I told my doctor about it and he did nothing. Sometimes I really hate him, but I understand that he treats me the way I deserve to be treated. I only go there like once a year. He likes that I'm healthy. I have a mental illness but he gets that, too. Yay!
It's amazing how the days just keep on coming and going. It's like I need to get busy doing something because otherwise the days fly by and you are looking back at 50 years and wondering what the hell happened. Inside every old person is a young person wondering what the hell happened. It's so true. Because you just get old. One day, you wake up and you realize you're already there. Soon it will be the time for your expiration date. That's a scary thought. But today is a good day to die. That's a good way to look.
Writing words and wondering why is a wonderful thing. Do you remember the time that you thought about starting this thing? I don't even remember but I remember the person who told me about it. I also started writing over at 750 words but that's all about the Morning Pages, which is part of the Artist's Way. I never finished reading that book. That's okay. I got the idea. It's good that I'm doing the Morning Pages thing. I need to get up and do something now. Right now is as good a time as any to start something new.
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Beware the Ides of June. That's just plain silly. We were careful for the Ides of April or the Ides of March? What the hell? Is there a reason for any of this other than to blather until I've written 100 words. That's not a good thing. I'm supposed to be writing things that have some sort of meaning. I need to get organized. That's a good idea. It's a good thing. There's a reason for not being organized. It's all about being all over the place. What brings me joy? I'm going to find out soon. That's the ticket!
Not working but still raining. Oh well, I told Ricki I would meet her this morning but her recall took only about 20 minutes instead of the three hours they told her. So we went to Bal Harbour Mall and she was fucking miserable. So we went to the Starbucks down the street and she was miserable. So I got rid of her. I didn't want to deal with that bad mood. I came home and slept for a few hours. That is how bad she made me feel! Oh well, what a day. A lot of rain, for sure.
Happy birthday baby sister who gets to start collecting social security today! It's too bad that she lives so far away. It's not even really that far but it's far enough that we don't get to see each other on a regular basis. These are the breaks. She is the only person left in my immediate family besides our son who is also far away. I have no immediate family in my vicinity. I'm just going to admit that's it. This is a good day. I have to go to work tomorrow. What's this about going to work on Sunday?
I got up way early, like 0500. Early to rise, but not early to bed. Therein lies the rub. Why do we sleep? It's a good thing. I need more naps. Naps are good. Why did we hate them as children? We were afraid of missing something. Can you believe that FOMO is a real thing? I don't like the rain but it's part of life. I was just thinking a couple of weeks ago how we've had such a nice dry spell. It was a fucking drought! And now it's raining like a cow pissing on a flat rock.
June 19 is not a special day except that I'm going to a funeral so it's a different kind of day. It's no one I knew. I'm going to honor the man. I work at a Jewish institution and he was a pillar of the Jewish community for like 50 years, seriously. So, there's that. Meanwhile, back in the year one when you belonged to no one and your pants were undone. That's adorable. I know. And then there's Maude. I watched for hours again yesterday. It's like a new tradition. Thanks for that idea Bobby. Those were the days.
My sister and her husband have threatened to come visit on July 15. That gives me a deadline. I can clear Justin's room easily in that amount of time. It's almost a whole month. I'm going to do it. That's the ticket. I will be glad to have them with us. It will be just like the olden days. Justin used to stay there with Sandra back in the day when that room was just as usable as any other in the house. And we're going to return it to that glory. I can feel it coming. It's exciting. Yeah!
Happy summer. I'm trying not to think about how hot it is. It seems to be working. If I don't think about, it doesn't make a diff! I'm sad for Mr. Otto Warmbier. What the North Koreans did to him was nothing short of murder. That guy's life ended at the hands of his tormentors. It's a sad story. I went to the library and checked out David Sedaris' new book. Lard have merry, it's 514 pages. What were they thinking? But it's just a diary, so it's going to be easy to read. He stole my idea. Oh well.
When I think of the volume of crap that I've written on the Internet, it's amazing. I downloaded like 10 years of my Open Diary writings and then I lost it. It's amazing how blase I have gotten about things lost. Every time I pass Computer Horizons and I think about that first Macintosh that I let grind to a halt, I'm sad, but otherwise I don't even think about what was lost. Years and years of memories. Documents and pictures that are gone forever. It's sad, but I had to get over it or I would stew forever more.
It's so easy to fall in love. It's so easy to fall in love. People tell me love's for fools. Here I go breaking all the rules. It seems so easy. Well you're concerned my heart will burn. It's so easy to fall in love. Look into your heart and see what your love has done to me. Well you're concerned my heart will burn. It's so easy to fall in love. It seems so easy. Well, you're concerned my heart will burn. Look into your heart and see what your love has done to me. It's so easy. Yeah.
Silver Threads and Golden Needles
I don't want your lonely mansion
With a tear in every room
All I want's the love you've promised
Beneath the halo moon
But you think I should be happy
With your money and your name
And hide myself in sorrows
While you play your cheatin' game
Silver threads and golden needles
Cannot mend this heart of mine
And I dare not drown my sorrows
In the warm glow of your mind
You can't buy my love with money
'Cause I ain't never was that kind
Silver threads and golden needles
Cannot mend this heart of mine
It's amazing how this thing can get away from you. I suppose if they ever update it so that you must write the 100 words on the day it comes out that would force me to write on a daily basis. As it is, I know that I can go back and write hundreds of words at a sitting. So, today I have 500 words to get out of the way because I haven't written 100 words since Saturday and today is Thursday. I'm going to write as though it were the actual day! Sunday I watched the Golden Girls.
Monday is good to me. It's just another day, I know. I have to go back to work. I'm in retirement yet I'm still working Monday through Thursday. On the Today show they're talking about books. It's kind of ironic that a TV show would promote books but I guess they're into all kinds of promotion. I think they even promote radio shows. Go figure. Today I will finish a major project at work and then I have to set my mind on a new project. That's the way it goes. I'm finishing another project and it will be done.
Now I'm on Tuesday. Tuesday afternoon, I'm just beginning to see. Now I'm on my way. It doesn't matter to me. Chasing the clouds away. Something calls to me. The leaves are drawing me near. I've got to find out why. Those gentle voices I hear explain it all with a sigh. Something calls to me. The leaves are drawing me near. I've got to find out why. The gentle voices I hear explain it all with a sigh. There I go filling 100 words with a Moody Blues lyric. I remember the first time I heard that song. Lovely.
The end of June is tedious. Soon it will be July 4 and we can celebrate our nation's independence. Are we still independent? I don't think so. Especially with the president that we are enduring. He's such an embarrassment. I don't mind. It's not affecting my life yet. I'm going to start collecting Medicare on September 1. It's hard to believe that I made it to 65. I'm sort of proud of myself. I wish I could lose a few pounds. I guess I have to wish a little more so I can really do it. I can do it!
I'm trying something new today and I'm jumping for joy. I drank a cup of coffee with milk and sugar and when it got less than halfway I filled it up with more coffee but not more sugar and milk. It's bitter for sure! It doesn't even seem to have milk and sugar but it's so minimal that it might as well be black. Is that my ultimate goal? To start drinking black coffee? I don't want to but that is what I'm trying to do. It's not going to work. I'm not a coffee person by any means, dude.
There goes half a year. That's what this day marks. This means that we've already passed half of 2017. It was hard for me not to write 2016. Talk about living in the past! Suddenly I just got the biggest urge to go to El Palacio de los Jugos. It's just that I want some of those big fat pieces of fried bacon. They call them chicharonnes. I just call them heavenly. So bad for me too. I guess that's why they're so fucking delicious. Greasy good. Let's go. I wonder what I have to do to make that happen.
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