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I'm sort of glad that I don't go to "work" every day anymore. Because today is the day that I was tortured by stupid jokes. As I got older, they became less frequent, but I remember some of the doozies. Like getting a post it note with a phone number to call Jane Baer, and it was the phone number for MetroZoo. Que cute. So I just dodged the bullet today. I tried to think of something cute to fool His Royal Smallness, but I figured years ago it wasn't worth it because he just wouldn't get the joke. Ha.
I smoked 100 cigarettes today. They all belonged to Linda but after a night of conversing and smoking and toking and joking, we both looked at the ashtray and were astounded at the number of butts just lying there. It was a sight that disgusted me so much that I immediately took the tray of butts and threw them in the trash. And then I thought about what I had done. Why must I smoke like there's no tomorrow? And why do I insist on identifying as a non-smoker? It's time to fulfill the prophecy. I have to stop.
Start early. That's why I'm writing today at 0530. Because I've already been awake for an hour and I still have my 750 words to pound out. I have to plug in the laptop because I just realized that the power is down to 13% and I don't want the thing to go dead while I'm tapping away at the keyboard. I have so little to say and so much time to say it. I don't want to work. I just want to bang on the drum all day. Well, I do have to finish the horrible taxes. Do it.
4/4/14. It seems like it should be a memorable date, but it's just another day! But TGIF anyway. The beat goes on. And the pace quickens. I still haven't done the taxes for His Royal Smallness but I'm glad that mines are done. Imagine, I was unemployed the entire year and yet the government wants me to pay $34. Go know. Somehow, I think the whole tax code is upside down. Why are we, the common working people, shouldering the lion's share of the tax burden while corporate welfare is rampant? That is the way of the world.
Okay, it's Saturday. I started the day with my usual routine. I visited Helen for lunch and she was lovely for about 20 minutes and then she turned sour. Instead of sitting there and taking her abuse, I just got up and left. I went to Costco and filled the car with gas. Afterward, I came home and relaxed for a few minutes. Then the excitement began. It was another large day. I like large days. It makes the time pass quickly. Letting the days go by. Letting the water hold me down. Letting the days go back. Water flowing.
I tended to Linda and Scott today. We did walk to the community garden and I planted collard greens and an heirloom tomato. There were also an incredible amount of weeds in Raoul's box, so I pulled all those. Afterward we went to Publix and Scott bought stuff to make a BBQ later. I could tell by the late time we went shopping that we would be having a late dinner. We ended up eating at 8 p.m. It was a fun day and I'm glad to have friends to share it with. Scott is my friend and family.
Time flies whether you're having fun or not. I went with Linda to Pier 1 and Best Buy. I witnessed her having a meltdown in the middle of Best Buy. Afterward, we took her Pier 1 purchase to her house and unpacked it. Then we went to Doraku for happy hour. We had sushi and salad and sake. A 3 ess dinner! It was a good day. I need to get busy with the tax return for His Royal Smallness. I swear I'm jumping on that tomorrow. Meanwhile, the TV beckons. Must lie down and relax. It's a good thing.
A former coworker called me last week to have lunch and then canceled at the last minute. We rescheduled for today. I spent the morning doing the taxes for His Royal Smallness. Luckily, he doesn't owe anything once again. It's amazing how he's gone all these years without paying but that's because the way taxes are done, he ends up having a large loss on his business. He's just making so little money that it's really not worth it for them to try to collect anything. Next year is going to be even more of an adventure with the Obamacare.
Yadda, yadda, yammer, yammer. What's the point? I come here and tap out a few words and then I'm on my way. It's the reason for the season. Pass the salt. That steak was delicious. I need a new menu. When's the routine begin? Begin the Beguine, do you remember? Remember me to one who lives there. She once was a true friend of mine. I heard a noise. Come on, feel the noise. Girls rock your boys. We'll get wild and high. We're gonna get high high high as the midday sun. That's it for today. Tomorrow's another day.
I wish I were in Washington DC right now. The cherry blossoms are at their height of beauty. It's okay though, I'm in a beautiful paradise. I haven't gone walking in days. I am definitely going to walk tomorrow morning. I've gone crazy with the smoking and it's having an effect on me. I am stuck. I need a new routine. I realized that I have let a lot of time go by without moving the agenda forward. It's time to get busy and create an agenda and move it forward. Time's ticking. I need to get busy. Let's go.
I feel springtime fresh. No, really. It's amazing how spring has sprung. The air is still cool but the sun is beating down. I need to get back into my old routine. I don't know how it happened, but I just stopped walking. When I was walking every day, I was feeling so much better. Now I'm back to a large slug. Oh well, it's that time of year to feel light while being heavy. It's going to be good to feel light and be light at the same time! Those days are coming. I know it. Man soon come.
My sister is visiting. I'm not sure if it's for Passover or what, but she's here. And her husband is working on Saturday. So, what does that mean for me? That I get to spend the day with her! She even sat with me while I had lunch with Helen. And then we went to Costco together. It was odd to have someone with me when I'm so accustomed to having the day to myself. I like it better solo! My sister is okay to be around, but she was invading my space and I didn't really like it. Mush.
Ugh, His Royal Smallness decided that today would be a good day to pretend that it was Passover for Ruth. She was less than impressed. I think that she was in one of her "gone" moods tonight. She just sat there and didn't say anything to anyone. And the way she ignored people was bordering on rude. I wish that Raoul wouldn't invite her or Bob or Mandy over any more. I don't want to deal with it. And, as a matter of fact, the next time he decides to do it, I will leave the house. I'm not ready.
Today is the day that I finally file the taxes for His Royal Smallness. I put it off until I couldn't put it off no longer. I suppose I could do them tomorrow, but I get a certain satisfaction of knowing that I didn't wait until the very last day. The funny thing is that I actually finished them last week but just never sent the darn thing. So, today I have to sit at the computer and hit the send button. And then move on to other things. Like what to do with this house full of stuff? Hoarder!
Beware the Ides of April. That's funny, because the saying goes, "Beware the Ides of March." But in today's world, it really should be, "Beware the Ides of April" because it's tax day. I wonder what else is going on besides McDonald's offering a buy one get one for a penny. I know it's also called Tax Liberation Day or some shit like that. It's a ridiculous idea because the whole idea of people paying tax for the government to run is ridiculous. That's why there's the whole notion of "corporate welfare." People don't want to talk about that. Truth.
I felt so weird yesterday like some imaginary weight had been lifted. I paid the homeowner's insurance and did taxes for both of us and I'm still here. Life goes on. Things are good. So why am I waiting for something bad to happen? I have a bad thing for that. I should just go with the flow. Good things come to those who wait. And lard knows I done been waiting an awful long time. Things will be just fine. Things are just fine. Let's go on a trip. We are! Can't wait. Done been planning for months already.
I'm going to "work" today. Not getting paid, but at least I'm getting out of the house. They called me yesterday from the CDC and asked me to help them. I only plan to work half days. I wonder if they know that. I doubt it, but I ain't giving too much. I'm just glad to get out of the house. It's good for me to get back into the world. I have been in a cocoon for too long. It's exciting to be in the work force. I need to have a job. It's been far too long, darling.
I went to "work" today. It was a rather surreal experience. I don't know what my status is there. I volunteered for almost eight months, helping to get a program off the ground and then I thought I would be hired for a paid job and the organization fell on hard times financially and ended up laying off half the staff. But now it appears that the money is flowing again and I'm being offered a job, albeit rather half assed and kind of circuitously. I'm going in on Monday to discuss. It's all good. It's good to be wanted.
I went to see Helen today. She was very talkative. It was a good visit. Afterward, I treated myself to lunch at Chipotle. Then I filled the car with gas at Costco and even went inside for a few things. I came home and relaxed and then Scott and Linda came over for very spicy chicken tacos. They were the bomb! We smoked and drank way too much, as usual. It was a good day after all. The weather has been so perfect lately. It's hard to believe that one month from now we won't want to do anything outdoors.
I'd say just another manic Sunday! It was one of those days that was quiet until the company arrived. Well, it was kind of hectic for His Royal Smallness as he was overseeing a construction project on the back apartment. A pipe had burst and needed to be replaced. I took his sister out for awhile so the work could be done without her under foot. I noticed that when we're in public she actually stands in peoples' way so they have to interact with her. Very astute on her part, but also a bit annoying. We ate at Wendy's.
It's Monday. I'm not going to "work." I decided that it's not in my best interest to go there and work for free. They will continue to let me do the work without paying me so I decided that until they make some sort of commitment, I'm not going back there. I need to feel good about working and one of the components of that happening is being paid a decent wage. I already know that if I were to get a job there, I would have to take a huge pay cut but at this point I don't care.
I want a joint. I want a cigarette. Quitting is hard. When the urge comes, I'm now filled with anxiety. So, to deal I just do something else. Like, right now, I'm tapping out today's 100 words. As soon as I'm done here, I'm going to hit that pile of paper on the chair next to the bed. Much of it will be shredded and that will make me feel much better. I ate a bowl of cereal so my hunger has abated. Meanwhile, I'm just spinning my wheels waiting for the next big thing. I need a new routine!
I started "work" today. I don't know how I'm going to like this. I already think I started at too low of a salary. And, of course, the more I think about it, the more offended I am that I was even offered such a low amount and that I accepted it so readily. I am so desperate. I guess I'll just work for awhile at this rate and then when I'm invested into the project I'll tell them that I'm worth more and I'll get it. I just have to be content to have a place to go everyday!
Letting the days go by. I'm just going through the motions here. I'm not unhappy but I certainly am not living a life full of glee. I need to be more uplifted. Love, lift me up where I belong. I just need to find that joy that's always been there. It eludes me. I can find joy in the smallest of things. I just need to look for it. I think I stopped looking for happiness. Linda and Scott and helping me along right how. Them, and alcohol. We're going to drink a bit of wine tonight. Wine good. Yes.
I was supposed to go to "work" today but I blew it off. It was only my official second day and I was already over it. I'm wondering how long this can go on. How long can this go on? How long can this go on? How long can this go on? How long can this go on? How long can this go on? How long can this go on? How long can this go on? How long can this go on? How long can this go on? How long can this go on? How long can this go on?
I blew off my visit with Helen today to go to a test drive with Scott. But it turned out to be a much different day than I expected. I was disappointed with the test drive because I didn't think we would have to wait in EPCOT type lines. So we drove around and did a little sight seeing and then we bought fish and went grocery shopping and came home and made fish tacos. Scott is a fun companion. We had a large afternoon and evening. Raoul was with Linda and Melinda. It was a fun day for everyone.
I spent the entire day with Scott. He's going back home on Tuesday. Linda texted me today that she wants to take us both to lunch tomorrow before he leaves. We three were an item for awhile. Those days seem so long ago and yet it was only a couple of months ago. The weather has changed just like it always does. We are adjusting but the air conditioner just runs and runs and runs. It takes an awful lot for the air conditioner to keep up with the heat in these parts. It's going to be a hot summer.
It's just another Monday, eh? Yeah, four Mondays this month but five Tuesdays and Wednesdays. What's the big deal? What's the frequency, Kenneth? Is your benzedrine? I'm worried that I haven't the words to fill 100 of them today. I will do it but I'm drinking sugary cola and thinking I have nothing to say. I'm fine. Really, I'll be okay. It's just another Monday. It's just another day. April is drawing to an end and spring has just begun. It's all going according to plan. There is a cause and effect. Spring has sprung. Tra fuckin' la. Oohla la.
Tuesday is a pretty good day to just lie about the house and do nothing. There's a pretty good chance I'll just lie about the house and do nothing. I got plenty of nothing and nothing's plenty for me. It's just another day. Do do do. It's just another day. I'm halfway there. I can keep on going. I have to get over to the community garden and water the plants. I'm in a pickle. Cucumbers, you know. It's going to be a good day. It's a nice day in the neighborhood. There are plenty of more words to write.
That's it. Another month gone by. How is that possible? The days, they come. And the days, they go. It's that inevitable march of time. I just keep putting one foot in front of the other and move on, baby. It's a lot better than the alternative. One of these days, I won't be tapping on the keyboard of my trusty laptop and then it will all be over. And then I'll be ashes to ashes and dust to dust. It's sounds kind of dirty. That's about the dirtiest thing I ever heard. The beat goes on. The pace quickens.
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