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This is my first entry here. I don't know what I'll write about, but if past experience is any indicator it will be rather useless drivel. Every once in awhile, I get truly inspired and something useful comes out. I think that the more one writes, the better one gets. So, with that imperative in mind, I will endeavor to improve my writing skills over the course of time. I am a happy person. I just met someone recently who said everyone is either evil or stupid. I believe in everyone's goodness instread. Life is good. Good day, dear reader.
I love the movie "Groundhog Day." At first, it wasn't that big of a deal. But the more times I watched it (it does seem to be a perennial favorite of cable channels) the more it grew on me. It's a good fantasy - that you can live your life over and over and improve on your lot in life. If I were able to live the same day over and over, I would be sure to win the lottery at least a few times. Money doesn't buy everything, but it sure helps with a lot fo things. Good day, darling.
Writing 100 words is almost like writing a twitter message of 140 characters, but just a little longer. I like it. It's a fun exercise. It seems a good way to get what's on my mind our there into the ethers. I hope they don't drop a bomb on your street. I wish "they" would stop dropping all the bombs! But meanwhile, my fervent wish is that no bombs are dropped on your street. Of course, I wish the same for my street. One bomb can ruin your whole day. I'm glad I've never had a bomb dropped on me.
February is a good month here in these parts. The days get a little longer and temperatures start to rise, yet the evenings stay cool. I like being able to take walks without sweating profusely. That's what happens when walking in these parts most of the year. I am starting an important resolution about a month late this year. It's one I've made for many years, but this is the year that I'm going to do something about my health, in general. Walking is the best way to begin. So, I intend to begin walking again. Good day, dear reader.
Saturday has become such a routine. I need a new routine. I like visiting my dear friend, Helen, in the nursing home. Even though some weeks are more pleasant than others, I feel like a once-a-week visit is the least I can do for darling Helly after all the good things she did for us all those years. That's not the dull, boring part of the routine. It's that every week, I'm going to Costco afterward and I want to get back to the habit of only going to that place once a month. That's really really enough.
Sunday is Raoul's day. We always start the routine the same way. Like every other day of the week, the first thing we drink each morning is a lovely steaming cup of frothy cafe au lait. On Sunday, this is usually followed by reading the newspaper and then heading to the ghetto farmer's market. After that, we do whatever Raoul has up his sleeve. Mostly we go to Ernesto's house directly afterward for a small cup of Cuban coffee and then the rest of the day is at Raoul's discretion. Today, we hit a few garage sales and came home.
I know why I don't like Monday. It's hard to get motivated when thinking about all the things that need to be done. It's looking at the week ahead that brings on the awfulizing. Plus, it's the realization that I'm going to spend another week at a job that I really don't like anymore, doing work for which I am undervalued and working with a group of people who mean nothing to me. Scheisse, I really need a new routine. I've been thinking about it long enough. It's time to make it a reality. It's all up to me, eh?
No matter how I try to make Tuesday just another day, it almost always ends up being a grueling day. There's something about the way my coworkers interact that tends to make me feel frustrated confused and angry. It's on Tuesday that I realize most how my job contentment is determined by how other people treat me. It's not just in my mind. There are outside factors that I react to, and not always in a good way. I'm trying very hard to be a decent and good coworker. It's not easy. Life is good, but it takes much work.
Humped. Humpty. Hump day. So much of how I'm feeling is tied to what's going on at the factory. Plus, lately Raoul has been way less than nice or even communicative. Put these together and my life has been one big fat stress ball. I joined Weight Watchers. Now I have to get serious about following the program. I've been putting it off, but it's just because I don't want to deal with the commitment. Why am I so lazy? I really need to do this. I'm out of control here. And this is a good way to start anew.
Letting the days go by. The relentless march of time. Some days, I think a lot about the future. Most days I think a lot about the past. But lately, I've been trying to think more about the present. It's the time of year for being in the moment. Life is so beautiful and good that every single moment is the best moment of my life. I'm glad to had lived this life. Today is a good day to die, but I'm not ready yet. Have I met you in another life? Were we friends in another time, or enemies?
You know it's not good to think about the future too much, because it's coming and it's going to happen pretty much however it wants. You know it's not good to think about the past too much, because it already happened and no matter how much you think about it, nothing's going to change. It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood. Won't you be my neighbor? Shabbat Shalom, y'all. I'm glad for the month of February, because it makes me think of my departed brother Mark, whose birthday was February 15, 1949. Mom, you were a miracle worker that day.
I'm glad that I spent time with long-time friends today. I visited Helly, like most Saturdays. I saw a new "friend" for a moment. I went shopping at Costco. And then tonight, I went to the art walk with a very long-time friend. We had a blast. The funniest thing is that she almost always goes to Costco with me, but didn't today. And tonight, when we were heading back to the car after walking for a couple of hours, a woman starting yelling at me, "Costco man!" We had waited in line together earlier in the day.
It really is true that the busier you are, the faster the time flies. Today was no exception. We began the day as we usually do, sitting in bed drinking coffee and reading the sunday newspaper. Then we took off for the ghetto farmer's market. While Raoul shopped, I searched for unloved furniture to photograph. Afterward, we drove to the mattress factory to make sure it was a legitimate business. After we found it, we stopped at a couple of garage sales. The afternoon was spent moving stuff around to make the house look less like an episode of "Hoarders."
Ugh, Monday. I remember when Monday was just another day. These days, I dread Monday because it means another mind-numbing week at the factory. It was a beautiful day outside, but I sat at my desk feeling trapped, bored, unloved and just plain useless. The afternoon dragged because I was not in the mood to do anything and all I could think of was how much I wanted to get out of there. Valentine's Day was really just another day. Spaghetti for dinner and then off to bed after a bottle of red wine. At least I slept well.
Today is my brother's birthday. He would have been 62 if he were still around. Too bad he checked out about 11 years ago. I've missed him, mostly on Feb. 15. When I was a wee one, I used to imagine what life would be like when I turned 60 and my brother would be 63 and my sister would be 57. Next year, hopefully. Meanwhile, things didn't turn out the way I imagined they would. I'm not complaining, but no one can predict the future. I'm very happy with my past and present. Que sera for the rest, eh?
I don't like Hump Day. Truth is, I'm no longer psyched about working at the factory. Been there almost 10 years. Hard to believe. And why do I still go there day after day, when I'm filled with such dread? Because I like to complain. Will I ever learn? You'd think I would have learned this lesson by now! But no. I'm still working on it. One of these days, I will finally realize that my own happiness comes from within and I'll not find it at any factory. I write confidently this is the year of the big change!
Only four hours into the day. This is the earliest I've ever written, but I know I have a grueling day ahead. That's why I'm awake at 0400. Raoul woke up and took out the garbage at 0330, woke me up and I've been schmying around the Interwebz for the past half hour and I decided to just go back to sleep because I have a lot of work to do today at the factory because I'll be out for a few days while we have Dunnellon visitors for the Coconut Grove Arts Festival. It's going to be a staycation!
Having a weekday off from work is a nice thing, but it has become a signal to Raoul that I am here to be his personal chauffeur. So, although I had a day away from the office, I worked for Raoul. Not that it was physical labor much, just being ordered around by His Royal Smallness just works my nerve. Luckily, we had house guests arrive in the early afternoon, so I was able to escape for a long, leisurely lunch followed by a little nap time. And we capped off the day with Shabbat dinner at the Ross house.
Candy and Scott and Rindi came to Miami this weekend specifically to go to the Coconut Grove Arts Festival. We made the same mistake of getting there at 9, when they don't open until 10. So we stopped at a little cafe in the Grove and had toast and coffee. Then we walked the streets of the Grove for about three hours before heading to a Greek restaurant on Coral Way. Came home, and napped for awhile. Scott made a fabulous BBQ and we ended the night with a walk up and down Lincoln Road. Met the Rosses, too. Fun.
An unusual Sunday, to be sure, but that's because we had three house guests and I think our main concern was getting them all out! After a little bit of running around in the morning, and a trip to Bagel Bar and Costco, they were on their way and we came back home for some more well-deserved nap time before we went to yet another party. This was one large weekend of eating, eating, and more eating. We finished the night at a surprise party at Havana Harry's where, once again, we ate way too much. Fast begins tomorrow!
Dead presidents tell no lies, but I'm very grateful that because of them, I got a day away from the factory. Today was a great unstructured day. I visited Helen in the morning. It was not a good visit because she was in a horrid mood. Afterward, I drove around sort of aimlessly and ended up in a Publix for a quick lunch which I ate in the car. Then some more meandering around town until I finally got back home and took a nap for a couple of hours. When I work up, we went to Publix. Good day.
This is how you can tell your life has gone down the tubes: The highlight of Tuesday is "Glee!" Today was a boring day. Nothing much happened. I went to the community garden. I drove around aimlessly and took pictures. Most of the day, I was simply lying in bed and wondering when my life became so utterly craptastic. Into every life, a little rain must fall. Today was virtually stormy and, by the way, it was too darn hot. I was supposed to go get some new spectacles but I couldn't find my insurance card. Tomorrow is another day.
Another day off from work. I spent the morning watching TV and lying in bed, and then Raoul insisted on cutting my hair. Afterward, he insisted that I cut his hair. And he complained the entire time I was doing it. The beat goes on. Afterward, we cashed in a Groupon and ate at King Kone. I dropped him back at the house and went to a meeting at city hall followed by a shopping trip to Publix. More lying in bed, and then I got up and made strip steak hash with a fried egg. Breakfast for dinner! Yum.
I owe. I owe. It's off to work I go. I was lying in bed this morning thinking about all the things that I have to pay each month and mentally eliminating each one until I realized that I could actually quit my job and live my lifelong dream of being homeless. If we sold this house and I got my cut of the profit, I could live quite comfortably for a few years and then I'd be on the pet food regime. Enough of that mental masturbation! I gotta go make dinner. We're having a guest tonight. Leftovers. Ha!
Today's big surprise was being let go early just as we were leaving for lunch. So, Amy and I went to lunch at Chipotle, returned to work and left after little more than half a day at the factory. When I got home early after a meandering drive, Raoul and Mary were just beginning to socialize, so I was sucked into their world for the next three hours. We had dinner together with her ex, Jim. Raoul had cooked brisket and I made a fabulous caesar salad. It was all good. I went to bed shortly afterward and slept well.
Another Saturday, same routine: Lounge about for most of the morning, shower and go to visit Helen. Put gas in the car at Costco and do something with Ricki. Today we planned to go to the bluegrass festival at Greynolds Park but after a bittersweet visit with Helly, I wasn't in the mood to sit in the sun, so we went for lunch at Anthony's Coal Fired Pizza. It was very good and I was very stuffed. So, I came home and crashed for a couple of hours. Woke up to Raoul demanding that I take him to visit Ruth.
This has been a month of Sundays. I never realized how much I bought into the concept of "Everybody's workin' for the weekend. Everybody needs a new romance. Everybody's goin' off the deep end. Everybody needs a second chance." "You wanna piece of my heart. You gotta stop where you start." Or whatever. I don't know why I devolved into that little distraction, but the truth is that Sunday is much like Saturday for me. These are two days that form the center of my life. I live for the weekend, because I've trained myself to hate my job forevermore.
Two months of 2011 already gone and where am I? The exact same place I was a decade ago. Today, I am just a fraction of what I was 10 years ago. Time marches on, and tomorrow is already the first of March. It comes in like a lion and I spend the entire month wondering how it could possibly go out like a lamb. This year, the weather around the world has been impossibly unbelievable. That means that this summer's hurricane season is going to be off the chain. I'm in full blown awfulizing mode. I can't get up.
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