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Maxine and me used to play like we were in jail. Sometimes, she'd be the jailer and I'd be the prisoner and sometimes it would be the other way around. Being the prisoner was always more fun. The jailer would find some place to lock the prisoner up and the prisoner would have to find a way to get out without the jailer noticing. The game could get frustrating, especially because Maxine is older than I am and bigger, but we still had a lot of fun, even though Maxine would always capture me after I had escaped.
I made a promise to my ROTC unit. I promised them that we'd be the best in the school district before the end of the year. That is a promise I know we will keep. We work hard, we don't slack off, we are obedient, we go above and beyond, we keep our uniforms spotless, we are united and strong. I have faith in everyone in our unit. They're all good kids and I'm their leader. I've been training them for this since they chose me as their leader. I won't let them down. I will be there.
Simon's just a baby in the stories, so I (the author) will write for him. He is the son of Peter and Sarah. If Peter actually loved Simon, he could have made him his protege. Simon would have inherited Peter's freaky powers, or Peter could have taught them to him. Simon would more than likely have ended up more powerful than Peter, especially since he would have learned the powers at such a young age. Simon would also have used the powers for good instead of evil. Maybe he could undo what Peter did in the story.
Public Affections (Cody)
I hate public displays of affection. I hated it when Sarah used to bring home boys and make out with them on the couch, in plain view of everybody. They should at least go into her room - somewhere out of the plain view of everyone else! It's so infuriating. She did it in public, too. We used to be able to go out as a family without embarrassment, but when Sarah hit puberty, she had to have a new boyfriend every week, and make out with them in public. If I ever get a girlfriend, I won't.
Put On A Happy Face (Blake)
Most people around Jekuvia High see me as the emo kid. I'm quiet all the time, I wear a lot of black, and I listen to screamo music and other stuff that's not played on the local radio stations. Because I'm quiet, people assume that I'm violent. I'm not. I'm one of the biggest pacifists you'll ever meet. I despise the war. My dad's in it over in Afghanistan, so I am completely anti-war. I don't think I'll ever tell the people at school that. It goes totally against their stereotype of me.
Put Your Clothes On! (Morris)
OK. I am going to be honest here, but I don't know how many are going to believe me. I'm a male, 19 years old, a sophomore in college. I'm straight. I don't watch porn. I repeat. I do not watch porn. I don't care for it. I think it's stupid. It's the epitome of falseness. If you want to watch empty sex, watch some animals, preferably rabbits. That's what porn is to me. Empty sex. Prostitution. Sex for money. I might not be the best person in the world, but sex doesn't equal money.
My ex-husband was always a puzzle. I wanted to have the best and most positive opinion on him, so I blinded myself to what he was doing wrong. I made it a puzzle for myself to get through once the blinds had been removed and once I saw the error of my ways. I wish I had seen it sooner. I wish I had not put myself through that psychological maze. Communication problems signaled our breakdown, and I only wish that the wires had not fallen in such random patterns, that it was not such a puzzle.
I'm in a bit of a quandary. It's about Eliza. I want to get her away from Adrian, but the question is... how can I do that when he's got her completely under his thumb? I think I might have to call the campus police on this one. Adrian abuses her. He hits her and he cuts her with this... horrible medieval torture instrument. That's it. I'm calling campus police. They'll have to believe me, even though Adrian is Student Body President and one of the most charismatic people around campus... they'll believe me. I really hope so.
It was Lissa's idea to make me stay here and watch the dorm while she gets her books. I feel like I'm in a quarantine. I am already beginning to think that rooming with her was a bad idea, especially since she's so paranoid about the area around our dorm. Hello, Lissa! You had a choice! You weren't forced to live here! I can't tell her any of that. She'll start yelling at me and start calling me crazy. Maybe I am the stupid one for signing up to live with her. I could've lived with someone anonymous.
They called me a queer before they got to know me. They called me a lot of homosexual things before the rumors about me and Sarah started. Now, it's undisputed that I'm straight, yet there are new rumors about me being the father of Sarah's kid. I'm not. I don't know how I know, but I just know that it can't be. I wish I could remind them of the old rumor about me being queer. Then they'd stop. But my high school is like drama central. You can't get away from it, no matter where you turn.
I am embarking on a quest. Today is the first day of the final semester of my life. After this, I shall embark on a difficult and utterly frustrating journey to seek employment, then sit in the stasis of a job for a long time, do my best, hopefully gain enough experience and kiss enough ass to get promoted. Maybe somewhere along the way I'll find a husband. Maybe he'll be rich enough so I can quit my job, stay at home and crank out kids and sammiches. Hopefully when I die, I'll have accomplished something worthwhile in my life.
He yelled to his best friend, "Stop questioning!" and that was when I knew I wanted him. He was a bad boy, but he had a soft heart. I can't help but fall for those types, even though I'm doing everything in my power not to. They seem to be attracted to me, probably because, according to my mother, I look "young and innocent". I get it. I am 21, but I look like I'm 15. One person even said I looked 12. I wasn't really offended; to me it's a compliment, but still... I can only take so much.
I'm a quiet person. Often, people mistake me for someone they can walk on, just because I don't speak my mind. Quiet people don't have issues. We know that the world doesn't need as much chatter and distraction as it does already. We are quiet because we are listening to you open your mouth and say things that are usually empty. In my lifetime, the quiet people are the ones who are smarter, and the garrulous ones are the ones who don't have much to say at all. They like to hear themselves talk - even if it makes no sense.
The last time I saw a rainbow must have been about this time last year. There was this strange yellow light outside, and I heard my neighbors talking. So I went out to stand on the breezeway and I saw a gorgeous rainbow in the sky, filled with the yellow light of a sun just beginning to set. I literally stood there with my mouth open, amazed at the beautiful sight. I normally don't get that kind of beauty where I live. Usually, it's all the dirty air and construction in the city. Seeing the rainbow was a welcome change.
I love Ramen Noodles. They are every college student's staple food. Now, they're even more awesome because they have them in low-sodium now. The taste is about the same, and so is the price, but they only have them in a few flavors. Pretty soon, they'll have them in all of the flavors and I can really have a ball, haha. Whether in the cup or in the plastic sack, Ramen noodles are great and have magical super powers. I just wish they were a little more healthy. I'd life off them, if only they had more nutrients.
For my senior year of high school, I went to Haiti to do some service projects with the Key Club. I was absolutely appalled by the conditions there. These people are so poor, they were living in ramshackle houses. You can't even consider them houses; a lot of them were just a collection of scraps from trash heaps. My friends and I built houses for them and passed out food and generally tried to make things better. I wonder how long it will be until the world has peace. That trip made me look at things very differently.
I'm very loyal to my friends. I really am. But I keep wanting to rat on X. He's not a nice person. I know what he does in his spare time and it's not nice stuff or even harmless, time wasting stuff. He is a cruel person. Jeannie won't see that, though. No matter what I tell her about X, she'll only believe what comes out of his mouth. He lies to her. I know he does, because I know that she'd never hang out with him if he didn't tell her the truth about what he does.
Real Summer Night
I miss the summer nights already, although it's starting to warm up where I live. There was something special and mystical about the summer - to me it was always like waiting for a new beginning; the new school year, or whatever. It was never a time to go out and party and get wasted, it was a time to contemplate and think about what had happened over the previous school year. On summer nights when it was too hot to sleep, I would just lie awake and think of all the different, sometimes amazing, things that had happened.
I want to find all my exes and reconcile with them. I want to sit them down and talk to them about what went wrong. I'll tell them what I did wrong and why I think I did it. I know there are probably three of my exes that would sit down with me and talk about things, but the other one... he still hates me. I don't really know why. I thought we had reconciled about five years ago, but he won't talk to me. I guess that means he must still have some feelings - although they are negative.
I used to use that word a lot when I wrote poetry in high school - it rhymed with a lot of things and just sounded cool in my opinion. Plus, not everyone knew what the world meant, so it made me sound smarter than I actually was. I lost a lot of my self esteem in high school - probably because I took it too seriously, as many do. I wish I could go back and redo my high school years. I'd focus more on actually doing well in school and trying to get into a good college rather than drama.
Red and Black
They're the colors of my school - the North Carolina State University Wolfpack. I've already ranted on and on about it in the one-week batch. WE WON! Now that it is not 12 at night when everyone is trying to get sleep, I can scream and yell (at least electronically, because it's still too early in the morning) about our victory! It's kind of funny; Duke is supposed to be so good and we're supposed to suck, yet we kicked their ass - and our biggest rival, UNC, lost too, so that's even more excuse for celebration! Happy times!
There's this lady at my church who makes these odd, subtle remarks that are somewhat anti-Christian. I don't even think she realizes it. She came up to sing one day and said something about "if I come back in a next life..." and I'm thinking, "Wow, totally not Catholic doctrine!" Another day, she said something about God - I forget what it was, but I'm pretty sure it's not something that goes with Catholic beliefs - it might even have been blasphemy. I'm not trying to pick on her - I just found it really amusing that she didn't seem to realize.
I need a vacation. It's my senior year. I've got projects to do - including that stupid senior project that we're all forced to do before we graduate. It's killing me. If this is what college is going to be like, shoot me now. Hello, teachers! I've got a job, too! Hello, boss! I've got school, too! Hello, parents! I can't do all the chores because I've got school and work! I really need to relax before I blow up - I haven't even gone to church in a month because of all this work I have to do... disappointing.
Rescue Me (Eliza)
I realized that I need a savior. I need someone to rescue me. It can't be Adrian anymore. I realized that he does nothing for me. Everything he does is torture. I feel silly that it's taken me this long to realize that's the truth. Ever since I've started talking to Zeke, it's become more and more clear to me. Maybe Zeke can save me from this - I'm too weak to pull away from Adrian myself. He's very strong and I know that he can stop me if he wanted to - and he would definitely want to.
I don't have my list of themes with me because I forgot to bring my flash drive down to the computer lab. I really want to burn bridges with my ex. I really hate how arrogant he is and how he's always searching for a girl that he will take for granted in six months. I hate myself because I dated him. I hate how much of an idiot I was to waste time with a fool like that. I really want to just forget he ever existed. It'll be easier to get over him if I forget about him.
Resistance Is Futile
When you fall in love, you can't resist. It's impossible. If you are ripped away from someone when you're in the process of falling in love, it's even more painful. About a year ago, this guy asked me out and the more I spent time with him, the more I started to fall in love with him - and then we just couldn't be together because despite falling in love, I didn't want another relationship. I couldn't handle one at the time. So I broke it off with him and we went our separate ways. I still miss him.
I demand respect from guys. If I ever end up dating someone else (highly dubious at this point), I'll demand that he respect me. I will respect him, of course, but if he acts disrespectfully towards me, he's out the proverbial door. There are certain things I can put up with, but there are other things that I just will not take anymore. If he yells at me, hits me, forces me into sex, or takes his anger out on me in any way, I'm done. I can't put up with that ever again - I won't stand for it.
It's been awhile since I've gone to a really good restaurant. I don't typically like restaurants all the time - it's OK to go once in awhile, but not every day. I know some people who do it. I'd rather just eat at home, but going to a restaurant with my family can be hilarious. My brother doesn't get to run away from the table immediately after he wolfs down his food, my mom doesn't drink an excess of wine and get pissed, and my dad messes with the wait staff. I just make them laugh. I need to go out.
Return to Me
I wish he would come back to me, but it seems like he's forgotten I exist. He and I are so much alike - we both have that capacity to erase others completely out of mind and forget about how our feelings toward them were. We're not clingy, he and I. We could have got along just fine, but I was convinced I needed to be alone. I know that deep down, it would be better for me, but it doesn't stop me from wanting him to come back. I keep dreaming about him and what could have been.
I can't wait until I'm finally reunited with Restless! It's been too long since we've seen each other. I've hated being at college and not having him there - I hope I haven't changed too much for him - I don't think he'll think I'm different at all. I've met a few new friends, but nothing will stop me from loving Restless - no matter what. I made that promise and I intend to keep it. I just hope that college won't eventually pull us apart... it's going to be even harder just realizing that Restless can't come and visit me.
Revelry. That's it for me. I don't think I'll ever get drunk again. I said that when I was a little kid - only about 11 - and I got drunk for the first time. I seriously could have died, they said. But even then, I was a big, strong kid. I haven't stopped drinking. Since that day, I've basically been an alcoholic. I don't know what to do about it - the meetings don't seem to help me at all. Will power does nothing. Even now, right now, I have a craving for a tall glass of something very strong.
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