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07/01 Direct Link
As explosive anger has the tendencies to be destructive but eventually anger subsides and goes away.
The perfect remedy for anger is pure love.
Love puts out anger in the manner that water puts out a fire.
Anger is a negative emotion and causes negativity to produce in the environment and atmosphere.
Anger is a destructive force.

After the love session certain confessions were made of which I wondered where she was getting this from. On the other hand I knew that she was not just pulling rabbits and doves out of a hat like a magic trick.

UnderstandingÖ

CompassionÖ
07/02 Direct Link
I read an article today which talked about the rise of bed bugs in North America. Why are bed bugs increasing?

The writer states that some of the reasons given were that it was due to a lot of international travel and the conditions in homeless shelters. He contradicts the statement by making a valid point.

We have always had lots of international travel and homeless shelters were worse in the past compared to what they are today.

The bed bug problem is that now bed bugs are becoming more immune to the pesticides that have been used on them.
07/03 Direct Link
In Zen or just in general the purpose in life is to learn non attachment.

In some cases it would be detachment from women and pussy, but detachment overall in all things.

The other thing is to lose all of my importance as though I really am somebody. It all breaks down to that basic question of who am I...

You should be going from lustful power to psychic, intuitive, and creative powers.

I need to finish reading the book ďWaking Up To What You Do.Ē

Maybe I am listening to gossip, talking non righteous speech talk and discouraging it.
07/04 Direct Link
ďUse death as an adviser,Ē is a term that I recall often reading in one of Carlos Castanedaís books and the Yaqui way of knowledge. This term can be found in Buddhism and in Islam.

Death is the ultimate reality that we have to face before we exit this world.

I had news that my sister had been talking a lot about death lately and to me sounded like a contemplation of suicide. I personally think that when a person commits suicide, they cut themselves short of living a life that could have been better fulfilled with a greater purpose.
07/05 Direct Link
I walked all the way from Colfax to Alameda and surprised about the status of my bank account. It looks like itís going to be a real struggle until the next paycheck. More than likely I will have to take out a loan.

I experienced a little bit of heart burn as I ate my last meal of curry mixed with the zucchini and squash I bought at Target today. The curry was what was left over from the chicken which was no longer in the dish. I enjoyed the meal and look forward to the fast coming up soon.
07/06 Direct Link
If you put a title on anything you will expect it to act in the manner in which you have titled it. This goes for all things.

The moment that I begin to say that this is a Zen experience or that this is a mystical state of consciousness then I am moving further away from the ultimate experience which has in truth no titles and cannot be explained.

So to say Zen this and mystical that as a word and a title needs to be obliterated.

The true mind cannot be preoccupied with these titles and things. Desire lessÖ
07/07 Direct Link
Crows cawing outside my window. They have been in my dreams lately and I am super close to them to where I am almost eye to eye with them.

I had a dream a few days ago that I was going to die soon.

My daughter tells me this morning that she had a dream that I was going to die in 10 hours.

Dreams are powerful indicators of that other world we often ignore in our day to day lives.

We are born only to die and maybe figure something out along the way.

Why am I really here?
07/08 Direct Link
One aspect in my life that I would like to have is the ability to be able to harness my chi. I would like to be able to harness the chi that is within me as well as outside of me. Presently there is very little that I actually know about Tai Chi.

Bring the chakras back into your mind. Visualize the inner workings of the body, the capabilities of self healing, and the potential of being able to be in tuned with the body and mind and other aspects of your emotions.

More examples of powers that are hidden.
07/09 Direct Link
The one downside about joining to a porn website as a member is that there will always be problems when you try to cancel. Try our trial membership for just one dollar for one day or three days. So you cancel within the 24 hour or 72 hour period and donít the site again after that. A few days later you should be able to find on your bank statement online that you were charged anyways. They will try to make you look like the fault bearer or they will try to keep you by offering a cheaper monthly charge.
07/10 Direct Link
Itís time for someone or some power to take over in this household. That someone would be me. Iím up late and past the midnight hours.

Changes that need to be made range from television, to the internet, the education and development of the children, and the discipline that needs to be structured are just some of the things that need some serious revising.

I feel as though I have been spiritually blinded by television, society and myself to some degrees. The more I read about it the more I know that itís true and that television should be eliminated.
07/11 Direct Link
Are all women besides the western woman, the same as the western woman in other cultures?

Do they bull shit and play the mind games with men like the women in the western culture do or do they learn from the westernized woman?

Iíve witnessed with my own eyes women who came from other countries to live here in the USA only to abandon their culture and everything else sacred for the sake of adapting to so called Western culture.

What is cultural about drinking beer, sleeping with who ever, embracing Christianity while denouncing your own religion, and watching television?
07/12 Direct Link
True Islamic women inspire me,
and give me that zeal,
in my heart
to desire Islam more,
imbuing my entire being,
radiating in my pores
like a soul on fire
in the burning cosmic sun.

Reading the Quran takes on a whole entirely different meaning as I read it word for word, while getting the translation of each single word.

In Arabic you must learn the masculine and the feminine forms of the nouns and the adjectives. This is one aspect of the language that raises its bar of difficulty, but it does not make the language impossible to learn.
07/13 Direct Link
When I went to the math lab today I saw some fake buck tooth leopard skin Flinstone wearing guy imposing as though he was some Muslim. I have doubts on rather or not he was actually Muslim.

ďWhatís up man,Ē he said while trying to pick up on some giggling Muslimah saying ďdo you know Aisha, Myesha, Taneeqwa Jones Smith.Ē

Did I sound mean when I said that?

I like this present dream, this present moment, is this present dream.

Have you ever been truly present in your dreams? Itís called lucid dreaming which is generally more fluid and alive.
07/14 Direct Link
Now Iím at school on the second floor by the window facing the Denver Performing Arts Complex. I love seeing the Black and Asian degree aspirated women here.

Sometimes women can make your days joyful like a feather being carried gently by the wind.

What was up with that white chick in the short black shorts with her legs all spread out like she was just dying to get fucked on the spot like in some porno video?

I feel like doing some witchcraft in what feels like a witchcraft moment.

Suddenly a ghost spider appeared on my algebra homework.
07/15 Direct Link
Out of all days for me to lose internet connection at home it had to be on my birthday. I called up the phone company and they said that the power in my modem is out and that I had to buy another one and then I would have to wait 6 days.

Now without internet I wondered what it would be like if the whole world lost internet connection. How would people cope without the internet, and certain businesses that depend on it for their financial survival?

At least I know that our world would still revolve in orbit.
07/16 Direct Link
In order to get to the roots you have to go back to the past. Getting to the roots can be found on all aspects in regards to life. You canít allow any woman to drive you crazy. You must study the woman and her roots.

What was the woman like 500 years ago or thousands of years ago in comparison to todayís woman? What happened and how did those changes come about?

Itís not just man and the world that has been corrupted, the woman has been corrupted too. Whatever happened to the sacred woman and her sacred ways?
07/17 Direct Link
I canít get upset with myself when I observe my mind or self delighting in what I think is bad or sinful. What I should be asking myself is, why do I find the thing to be so delightful. Sometimes our question of why does not come with an answer, unless you look a little deeper, and do some innervestigating.

The nature of man is to be attracted to the woman and the nature of woman is to be attracted to the man. There is no way out of this. This is just the way God made us to be.
07/18 Direct Link
I watched Erykah Baduís video Window Seat for the first time. It was a song that I never heard of before. What was trippy about the video is that as she sang and as she walked she began taking off her jacket, then her shoes and to my surprise in the end she had taken off everything. What was she thinking? I think that she was trying to make some kind of statement of some sort perhaps political in nature. She was supposingly assassinated I guess for her ideals and new found freedoms. In the end she is a Goddess.
07/19 Direct Link
Iím reading Each Moment is the Universe and I have to agree that we act as though we have all the time in the world when inevitably we must all die.

What will you do with your life, until then that final moment?

A good question to ask is if we eventually die what is the real purpose of even being here?

Everything we do is for what?

It would be scary to think that there is no real purpose to life at all and that the answer to why we were here was in fact no answer at all.
07/20 Direct Link
Perhaps God is not that dogmatic, wrathful, vengeful God that we have been led to believe.

I think that besides what we've read in scriptures or heard about God, we have to know for ourselves and our experiences of whom or what God is or if God even exists. We have to continually ask ourselves this fundamental question.

Who is God is almost like asking the question who am I? Once we come up with answers, how do we really know? How do we know that we are not just making everything up? ThinkÖ what if God was an extraterrestrial?
07/21 Direct Link
So what has having not having any internet in the last few days teach me?

Not having internet has taught me how addicted we are to it and how in many cases people would not be able to function or cope without it.

I have also learned how being happy or angry really serves no purpose. Both states arise and dissipate.

The thing with happiness is that we seek ways of being happy only to reach disappointment that when we attain the object that we feel will bring us happiness that that happiness only lasts for brief periods of time.
07/22 Direct Link
While doing my area 14 check, I did some martial arts on the 2B parking garage level. The more I practiced it the more that I began to see it as a spiritual art versus just being physical.

Iím at the 11 bus stop with light drizzles of rain. As I looked all around me I asked myself is this all there is to it in this present moment?

My answer was ďyes this is it, and it does not get any better than this. Embrace it and accept it.Ē

This is the art of living in the present moment.
07/23 Direct Link
This morning I went to the Post Office to send off things and items. It turns out that the package I was sending didnít have the acceptable shipping tape on it; more post office rules and regulations.

The other package I had I could not find a box that was big enough to send it off. It was wrapped in grey plastic with a UPS label on it.

I was supposed to be going to the math lab this morning and this was now becoming a project. The only thing I wanted to do was just get this over with.
07/24 Direct Link
As I walked down the street with my sunglasses on I felt like I was an assassin and a smooth calculative operator at the same time.

This thought came after I saw two young kids walking down the street like they were so hard. They walked as though they had fought many battles.

As I studied them I realized that this was an outward display of strength.

The theory goes that if you are really strong and powerful you donít have to show or display it.

If you are weak then you have to fake it until you make it.
07/25 Direct Link
Be fully aware of your surroundings in order to bring more awareness to the present moment.

Get out of the notions that you are supposed to do or have to do certain things. You donít have to do anything at all. You can easily just become a bum if you really wanted to.

Do you love yourself enough to love others?

Sometimes people say that they love themselves but they hate their own race and people. This isnít love at all, just pure self hatred.

The causes could be numerous, but one should really get to know himself rather well.
07/26 Direct Link
Why did God create women? I would like to understand the woman but oftentimes she seems like a math problem thatís hard to solve.

The woman who is exploited in this world is not just an object. She gives birth to the multitudes.

Why is there more women than men on Earth, so that men can have more than one?

How does the woman relate to our mother called Earth?

What happen to the time period when women were actual Queens?

Has the true concept and natural concept of woman been corrupted through such media outlets as the porn industry?
07/27 Direct Link
Between seeing or observing what we see is a cloud of confusion as we perceive this world. It is confusion mixed with distortions.

What we see is what the mind has been programmed to see. The day to day things that we see are things that we were taught to see and taught to name.

We learned how to label everything and put things in categorical order. This is a spoon and this is a fork, and this is what it is used for, end of story.

But is that all there is to a fork and to a spoon?
07/28 Direct Link
The Zen, mystical, or nature as it truly is state, is the state where there is no names, titles, positions, or descriptions.

Everything that you see is nameless and there should not be any term given to it.

Today I received my math test results in class. I got an 88 in red ink. While I was looking at my score a red colored spider dropped out of nowhere. It crawled on the floor while two girls sat unaware until I squatted down with a piece of paper.

I walked the spider outside and put him in the secret garden.
07/29 Direct Link
In each moment study the nature of your mind and all of its various states. If you really look at the world in which you live in and what it consists of, it boils down to an agreement of words, descriptions, titles, ideas, and functions. If you take away all the words what do you have left? You would have no this or that.

Today I spent considerable time in the sex section of books which dealt with various topics.

Sex cannot exist if love and spirituality is not involved. In absence of those principles it becomes pure animalistic humping.
07/30 Direct Link
Donít think about what you will do later on inside of your day or tonight or be concerned about what happened earlier in the day or about what happened yesterday.

Thoughts of what was and what might be should be discarded. Itís a web of entanglement, trapping you from engaging fully in the present moment and from obtaining a deeper state of mind.

What propels each of my single actions? Pay attention to what you do and ask yourself why you are doing it.

Things come and things go, this is the nature of all things in life and death.
07/31 Direct Link
Combine all the elements in respects of symbology like the Tarot, the Dream Spell calendar, Kabbalah, numerology, poetry, and various other symbols and what do you come up with? Most symbols that you find will be found in the East.

I remember when I was young; I hated Westerns especially the ones where Indians were made to look like savages and always lost their wars and battles.

Nowadays I know much better. If it were not for Clint Eastwood Westerns I probably would not appreciate the others. It is interesting to see the lifestyles that they lived during those times.