07/01 Direct Link
As we walked to the 40 bus stop and I observed my daughter as to how tall she was getting, I was able to go back in time to when she was just a little baby and how I was able to hold her on my chest.

I could only guess what the future would hold for her, my only hopes being that she would be a successful and happy woman.

Time framesÖ
That which grows,
and that which decays,
processes and phases
of life going
from past
to present
and present
to past,
shifting time zones
in the mind.
07/02 Direct Link
I feel as though my fast is being taken to another level. I feel weak again and wonder if the fasting process repeats itself all over again like the first three days again.

I donít know if my head is being filled up with savory dishes I viewed in all those cookbooks are pronging me to give up, or if my body is saying that it has had enough for now.

I donít want to become a vegetable on this fast.

As the world turns and stars twinkle,
the lethargic stages donít last forever.

These symptoms may be purifying periods.
07/03 Direct Link
You unlock this door with the key of imagination,
beyond it is another dimension.

A dimension of sound,
a dimension of sight,
a dimension of mind.

Youííe moving into a land
of both shadow
and substance,
things and ideals,
youíve just crossed over
into the Twilight Zone.

Today is the Twilight Zone marathon where they show all of the Twilight Zone episodes.

As a child I grew up with these episodes in black and white every time there was a holiday there was a Twilight Zone. Itís amazing that science fiction was so alive then, as it is even now.
07/04 Direct Link
The morning has a special magical appeal to it as I step outside and feel the first rays of the sun. It warms my body and I instantly feel happy and light.

Itís better to be up in the morning to experience its magical benefits.

The birds sing and are happy because the sun has dispelled the night. All beings eagerly await the first rays of the sun to receive the morning message the morning news for the day.

At other times the sun can be scorching and relentless, unforgiving, and unmerciful; especially when the degrees increase 1000 more degrees.
07/05 Direct Link
I enjoyed the hot bath that I took while listening to classical music contemplating quantum physics, astronomy,
my biological cellular structure,
the various aspects of mathematics
from simple arithmetic
to physics
beyond calculus and trigonometry
deep into the Universe,
the water enveloped me
relaxing the muscles within my body.

Do you know the name of every muscle inside of your body and each skeletal bone?

Do you know the constellations within your solar system or the name of every country and each of their cities and capitals?

Can you tell me how to get to the Milky Way Galaxy?
07/06 Direct Link
I have often asked people what is the difference between the brain and the mind, or if the brain and the mind are one and the same thing.

In the general sense it seems that the brain mainly refers to its physical aspects and grey matter, whereas when we refer to the mind, it seems to be more vague and kind of out there.

We say things like mind over matter which includes all material objects.

If this is the case we would have to include brain as being part of the material world also.

How about mind over mind?
07/07 Direct Link
Observe your own thoughts and the thoughts of others that lead to their motivations and actions.

Donít allow someone elseís emotions to affect your own, especially when youíre in a good mood and their only motivation is to bring you down to the lowest frequency.

Perhaps there is a parallel universe in the far out reaches of the heavens where there is another me, just like me, but an identical me that chose different paths in his life.

A parallel universe is highly possible but proving that it exists is an entirely different thing.

Truth truly is stranger than fiction.
07/08 Direct Link
Today I officially beat my longest period of fasting for 13 days. Today marks the 14th day that I have been fasting without food.

Since Iíve been fasting my interest in the field of science has peaked dramatically.

Have you ever noticed how these science guys get famous or receive wide acclaim just by their theories alone?

The odd thing is that their theory is not definite but tends to take on a true form until proven otherwise.

If they can come up with theories why couldnít I?

I have my own theories for black holes for all its worth.
07/09 Direct Link
I found this book entitled Strangers written by Dean Koontz laying on one of the housekeeperís carts while walking on the 7th floor.

It talks about a manís obsession with gambling which suddenly turns into an obsession with astronomy;
mainly the moon.

It started off just as a sort of hobby but then it becomes an obsession.

I found that interesting part just by browsing some small passage in one of the chapters that was not in sequence.

I felt that the book was just for me with its bent up front cover and read more than once it seemed.
07/10 Direct Link
ďOoh! A butterfly!,Ē she said, as it fluttered about passing the flowers that laid about in the green grass and scattered rocks.

My whole attitude about the butterfly was big deal, until I began to think about how for her it was a real wonder.

Have my senses become so numb to creation?

Itís not that I think that our reactions were completely different. I marvel at creation, but maybe since I was fasting, it made a difference on how I perceived things.

I thought that maybe I was a bit rough to her and should lighten up a bit.
07/11 Direct Link
What does physics and philosophy have in common?

I was reading this article by Max Tegmark in my issue of Discovery which Iíve recently subscribed to.

In this article he is talking about our mathematical universe and parallel universes and cosmology and the works.

Iím thinking more about banana bread, coffee cake and egg plant lasagna.

How does that equation fit in with our mathematical universe?

I can tell you that in this case chemistry is definitely involved.

Philosophy seems to be more concerned about the questions of life,
while physics is more concerned about what things are made of.
07/12 Direct Link
Fasting, abstaining and pushing towards the goal of deeper inner light, traversing the uphill road of physical and spiritual difficulty is truly the mystical path.

When you are sleepy,
instead of saying I must sleep
you should say
I must meditate.

At least in meditation you are still somewhat still aware consciously.

How do you identify with yourself as being?

Do you see yourself as having a self possessing ego, spirit, soul, a cosmic galactic being or do you see yourself not having a title?

It is probably much easier to identify with the truth you entered the world with.
07/13 Direct Link
We are responsible for every action and motion of our bodies and thought rather we realize it or not. We will have to pay for all of our bad deeds or actions that go against the universal law of life. For every action and thought we execute there is some consequence involved. It may not seem so at times because everything in life is not so instantaneous. It may take years for you to get your just due for the innocent man you killed or for refusing the love that was offered to you. This is the law of karma.
07/14 Direct Link
As the path to truth and the seeking of the ultimate reality continues, some spiritual sayings which seem to sound like a paradox or seems to make no sense at all seems to take on new meaning, as layers of veils are removed from the eyes.

In this world of material illusions weíre led to believe on a day to day basis that the acquirement of things will bring us true happiness yet no one has proven this to be true.

On the spiritual side we are told to give up the things of this world to bring true happiness.
07/15 Direct Link
İFeliz CumpleaŮo Nuevo!

Itís my birthday today
which does not come as a big surprise,
but the one things that I am happy
and humbly proud to say
is that I completed my 21st day of fasting today.

I have gone 21 days without a morsel of food and I attribute this not to my own self but to the powers that be as well.

I was never alone in this fast though no one knew I was fasting except myself.

Truthfully speaking, I do not have an age,
nor am I bound to time
except the perception of mind.
07/16 Direct Link
Footnote 2732 is referring to Surah 89 ayat 30 which says Ēwa ad khulee jannateeĒ which means ďand enter my garden.Ē

The concluding verse of this chapter is referring to the highest stage of the spiritual development of man;
the stage in which man finds rest, content, delight and quietude with his Lord.

At the mutmainnah or heavenly spiritual stage, the perfect sincerity, truth, and righteousness of a person are rewarded by being granted heaven on Earth.

Everyone else looks for some distant heaven in the clouds while he experiences his while he is living.

His prayers were not wasted.
07/17 Direct Link
The benefit of fasting is that it does put you more in tuned with your body. Being able to tune into your body can enable you to tune into your mind, which would enable you to tune into the body and minds of others as well.

Iíve noticed that since the 21 day fast, my body calls for less food and is rather content with one meal which can carry me all the way into the next day.

Elijah was correct when he said that we donít need to eat 3 meals a day.

Where did that concept come from?
07/18 Direct Link
It all dawned on me while I was crouching down in the kitchen leaning my back against the kitchen cabinet while eating a mango regarding the meaning of dhikr in Sufism which means remembrance.

The object of remembrance is directed towards the Supreme Being; Lord of the Universe.

Remembrance of the divine Supreme Being canít be effective without also being conscious of where you are.

In my case I was squatting down in the kitchen eating a mango.

I was contemplating on who made the mango and how it was blessing for me to be able to taste the nectar.
07/19 Direct Link
As I walked the various floors, I enjoyed the sweet smells of perfume and the smells of fresh brewed coffee in the early hours of the morning.

India spice chai would be on my menu today for selection of teas to drink since I never tried it before.

What is the meaning of life?

If you want to know the meaning of life you should meditate on the various aspects of love and ask yourself what is love.

Many think that love is this rubby dubby thing that has no spine or back bone.

Sometimes love means letting something go.
07/20 Direct Link
The true power of dhikr isnít meaningless repetition without contemplation behind the meaning of what weíre saying.

This applies to reading the Quran or doing our prayers.

We shouldnít see repetitive actions as so dull, to the point that we forget why weíre doing them to begin with.

Later I found myself at Barnes and Noble with the urge to purchase Sun Tzuís Art of War along with several other books that I saw, but later realized that the best Zen action for me to take was to not purchase anything at all and to simply allow myself to be.
07/21 Direct Link
I find myself suddenly wanting to see a Tamil or Hindi film while Iím walking the floors past midnight.

I really miss Temasek, my beloved city.

Shadow Cast on Mars was the headline on USAís newspaper. I thought it was an update about some discovery on Mars, but they were only talking about their financial burdens and how future projects did not look so bright.

It seems to be everyoneís story today regarding money, with all the blame being blamed on the high prices of gas which ultimately points to the pointless war going on in Iraq and even Afghanistan.
07/22 Direct Link
Iím thinking of every possible way not to waste food
from raw vegetables
to crumbs from bread.

Vegetables can be steamed and frozen
and bread crumbs can be fed to birds
or even to Hansel and Gretel
those two fat kids.

My book Rumiís Sun finally came in. I can never get enough of Rumi, or the other books within my possession.

When the sun sets at twilight,
itís the hour of the children.
If you listen carefully
you can hear them playing outside.

As long as I hear them playing outside,
I feel as though everything will be okay.
07/23 Direct Link
I know that it is summer and that the Sun generates heat. For some reason when I cook in the kitchen and complete the process it seems that the heat just stays there and never moves out. I couldnít figure it out until I examined the compost I had been collecting consisting mainly of the discarded parts of the vegetables and fruits that I did not want. I could not believe how hot this bag was and wondered if it were winter here if the compost would still generate the same amount of heat. Seems like I need a fan.
07/24 Direct Link
In the moment you can only do one thing at a time.
Focus on that one thing
and be at one with it.

I was glad once the Nextel training at my job was over. No one wanted to be there, but it would be worth the stay as it counted for two hours overtime.

I bought a venti latte and two blueberry muffins to enjoy once I reached home.

I donít try to spend any time outdoors with the severe heat that we are having.

I enjoyed making avocado sandwiches and watching Jumper sent to me by Columbia House.
07/25 Direct Link
He hung himself and he fired himself. I guess he was not a real genius by using the company computers to not only view porn sites, but to also do a few print outs and then leave the print outs in the print out trays. What an idiot.

The morning manager of the club for the guests was not happy to see these images since she was a woman and all, but who knows, maybe she was really turned on by it and only pretended to be disgusted.

The employee confessed his sins to the clergy and had himself ostracized.
07/26 Direct Link
Iím interested in the history of the exploitations of the Europeans in the manner that they colonized an entire nation of people and in some cases stripped them of everything.

Iím talking about the French, the Italians, and the British whose rebels and discontents extended to the Americas and yes, even the Spaniards.

They all took part in some form of slavery regardless to the degree that they treated their slaves.

Among other things, they all colonized some nation on some continent or continents in one form or another.

In what role do they play today with colonization or attempts?
07/27 Direct Link
Things really seem weird now, like a shadow illuminated by light. There are so many things on my mind dealing with the past, present, and future.

I just woke up from what I call a stuffy intoxicating situation. My room is extremely hot and there is no fresh air circulating in my room. Itís all stuffy like mustard gas, my whole entire back is sweating profusely and I have been suffocating in my sleep the entire time.

Despite these dilemmas I still managed to get the sleep I needed, but the way I woke up seemed to be another story.
07/28 Direct Link
Once I leave my apartment complex and walk a few blocks away my ears and senses begin to notice the sounds of cicadas which to me sound melodious coupled with the sound of crickets chirping in the night air.

It is only during the summer that you hear the sounds of cicadas and not always at the very beginning of summer.

The odd thing about hearing them in the day and night is that I never see them.

I never see them flying or fluttering about into some night lamp.

This makes them somewhat mysterious, being heard but not seen.
07/29 Direct Link
Once I reached home this morning I poured myself a big bowl of cornflakes adding bananas and raisins and then watched a few segments of Judge Joe Brown.

It is hard to digest my food while watching Judge Judy. She is like the bitch that you would love to slap. One time would not be enough.

I slept for a little while and my job called me, or should I say the big fat sloppy girl who used to be my supervisor asking me if I could come in early.

I agreed because I can use all the overtime possible.
07/30 Direct Link
It can be either a pain slipping bills under the guest doors or you could adapt to the situation and learn something new.

In my case I found myself doing Tai Chi, Kung Fu, and Plum Flower pose.

If you bend over to much, after a while you could develop some serious back pains.

I tend to shift my body weight at various angles to eliminate the strain.

Everyone who delivers the bills in my department complains since it isnít technically our job.

This is true, but if we donít do it, who will?

The hard worker is duly rewarded.
07/31 Direct Link
When weíre not fully here and now
cognizant of the moment
then we are robbing ourselves
of the Zen
and mystical aspects of the moment.

We will continue to take life as this miserable thing to be lived
which only has brief glimpses of happiness here and there
and the rest of the moments are to be lived with bitterness and regrets.

If this is how you feel then you are not truly living.

What you need is a good razor to shave off the past
and a good pair of scissors
to snip off the anticipated and expected future.