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Hey, this is cool; stream the consciousness? I'll consider it a "sign,"the way I found this site. Yesterday, I was trying to figure out what the person I work for wrote on her check so I could log it, but if you don't block the next carbon, it's all a mess. Something "Automotive"- looked like "Qualba"or "Quelba." I Googled, to give it a go. "Quelba"yielded a hilarious bogus TV Guide listing. Try it. Like the weird names my husband used to make up. It was the last day of May - it's a sign! Next time, maybe fiction.
Fragrance wafted through the confines of his mind. Inside the toaster, things looked pretty bleak. Threading through the Arctic, the ghosts of all the dead explorers and their crews began to arrive for their annual meeting. "I'm gaining a toe-hold on him,"said the snake, as the lizard shook his head, pitying the snake for having no toes. Frequently, I flew into uncontrolled rages just thinking about the wrong choices I'd made. In the summer, my creative muse would regularly abandon me when all I could think about was getting out of the heat. Could this be the beginning?
Yesterday, I thought of the toad I found about two years ago sitting on the bathroom floor. Very small, cute. I caught and released it outdoors. I've always liked toads. Their brown patterns are almost jewel-like. As a kid in camp, I caught and released toads many times. Good memories. I rarely see toads anymore. That night I saw a toad in the road, despite darkness and rain. It's eye glowed in my headlight. Luckily, I'd bought a keyring light earlier that day and so could find it again. Scooping it up, I placed it safely near the tree.
Most people use this as a journal; nothing wrong with that. Thought I'd write more fiction, but fiction doesn't come as easily. Found most of what I've read quite good. Other people have productive, exciting lives and thoughts. I wrote about toads. Today I didn't go with Danny to Atlanta, another battle-of-the-bands. Traveling, setting up, tearing down, many hours I don't have patience for anymore. I used to go to all his gigs when I first came to Georgia and when we were first married, years and several bands ago. Instead, I had an unproductive, sleepy day.
What am I going to write about in 100 words? Come on, it's late, I need to sleep. Very frustrated at not being able to get on the Internet yesterday, and Danny said it didn't work this morning either. I don't know what to write about, I'm just going to waste this writing that I don't want to write anything. Fine. I could write about my day... I don't want to write about my day. I had an idea for a fiction piece, but my brain is not prepared for it at the moment. Maybe tomorrow I'll write it. Maybe.
All known forms of communication are within my abilities as translator unit: lingual, gestural, computational, chemical, olfactory, tonal, telepathic or by any other means. English is the language native to this "forest"area, according to our records. We assumed the dominant species must be the largest life form. Approaching a member of this community, we reverently bowed, expressing our peaceful intentions. Not in English, but chemically and telepathically, this "tree"related that a much smaller, younger life form dominates "Earth"despite the great majority and contributions given by the planet's trees. "Beware,"it warned, "our human beings are extremely dangerous.-
1 package boneless chicken
1 lemon, cut in half
1 or 2 cloves garlic, chopped
Olive Oil, about 2 tbsp.
Rinse chicken, remove excess fat, etc. Cut into strips. In bowl, coat chicken with half the lemon juice and plenty of lemon pepper. Can add other spices and grated zest of the lemon. Heat oil with garlic on medium high. When garlic begins to cook, add chicken. Cook until underside begins browning. Turn, cook till no pink in middle. Check by cutting a large piece. Add remaining lemon juice. Goes well in salads, sandwiches, with rice or pasta.
New temp job, no time for bathroom, had to leave. Hoped feeling would go away. New building, mostly empty. Cleaning lady was sweeping steps. Long time getting work all set up, etc. Same cleaning lady, cleaning bathroom. Same, about 30 minutes later. WAITING. When she cleaned around me in the office, knew I could FINALLY use the bathroom. Then, took lunch late, 1:30 or 2. Small area, empty tables, no one but the ugly cleaning cart and she was there cleaning, vacuumed literally around me. I have nothing against her; this was just weird. Next day, took lunch outside.
Swore I wouldn't let my writings fall off. Noted and/or mentally prepared for days I didn't have time or energy to write, though. Shoulders were killing me, head hurt, eyes, ears and brain had had enough. Wears me out. Hope I keep up with whatever their expectations are and get done fairly quickly. If I could, I'd tell interviewers who record for the sake of transcription: it's not conversation. Stick with specific questions, don't interject "okay,""mm hm"and "right"constantly. If you fall into personal discussion, pause it. Speak slowly, clearly into the mike, don't run words together.
Our 18th anniversary, and no better way to spend it than at a wedding! Dave and Sandy got married, and the wedding was beautiful. Outdoors at a B&B, somewhat formal - string quartet, everything pretty and tasteful. Sandy looked like a princess. Dave got quite emotional during the ceremony. That's love! Even nicer that this is not a very young couple as most who marry. Being our anniversary, couldn't help but think of our wedding: backyard of the band house we lived in, some bikers, informal to say the least. We couldn't afford much, but we're just as much married as other couples.
What? My magnetic poetry during Katrina: After the windy bitterest rain storm hit we watched on TV here as thousands swimming through repulsive flood waters together frantically screamed crying please we want out, sadly asking how & why me as smells of death rose up in the enormous ugly void. They need essentials. All has gone away. It is a crushing blow to go having to leave friends and loved ones behind. Some shot, some delirious in a sea of madness. I could never live these days if my life were there, I am thinking I would be weak and powerless.
Had a filling fixed - refilled? Much waiting. "We have a little girl that's nervous." "That's alright, I'm nervous, too." Valuable sleep time, like on the subway? Didn't work. Stopped sleeping on the train after I once fell asleep on a stranger's shoulder and he didn't move me. Imagined I was on the #6 instead of in a dentist's chair in Georgia. Could've taken the 4 or 5 to 86th but didn't mind taking the local. My fantasy, sparse crowd, even at the museum. Prickly numbness crept over my tongue and face, Tried to imagine away the drilling and other discomforts.
Feeling tired nearly all the time now. Can't really get used to the schedule, and my only break is a half hour lunch. An hour would be too much. Besides, I want to get the work done ASAP. Some random thoughts: I'd like to roll around and sleep on that cushiony, bright green grass. I see a water spout. They designed this building to look "classic." I wish it had big, gruesome gargoyles, or at least some carved faces. All these young trees are strapped down. I'd like to see them break their tethers and go whizzing through the air.
More random thoughts at lunchtime: Quotes are everywhere, in concrete, etc. "The American success story is not in our genes but in our freedoms." Wait a minute. That doesn't really make any sense. Genes and freedoms? It should've been either: "not in our genes, but in our achievements,"or "not in our material gain, but in our freedoms." Have to return "Old Souls,"to the library. Never finished reading it because I can't seem to concentrate on much reading lately except for at work. I'm really very interested in this book; it's about documented cases of children remembering past lives.
Walked barefoot in the grass today at lunchtime, soaking up sun before I had to go back into too-cold air conditioning. The grass was cushiony and scratchy, felt good under my feet. Needless to say, no one was around. Nice garden, all to myself. One more day; looking forward to the weekend, but who isn't? Must remember to call Dad this Sunday. Sent a big Father's Day card. Never made that collection of jokes I'd planned. I'll do it anyway; Dad won't care if it's late. Mom says when they get Reader's Digest, Dad goes right to the jokes.
Roadkill is tragic. Dead wildlife is sad, but I'm more saddened when it's a dog or cat as of course, I know personalities of pets better than of wild animals. Also, it may have been preventable. Humans are responsible for dogs and cats, and a dead pet may have been a dumped pet. Having & knowing cats, I'm especially saddened to see a dead cat, like the young tabby kitten I'd just seen. Enough scares, so our yard's fence is cat-proofed; they can't get out. A squashed chicken, too: feathers and red mush. They fall out of chicken trucks somehow.
Washed and cut up a fresh pineapple, apples, two kiwis, seedless red grapes, strawberries and bananas, all into bite-sized chunks. Covered with a good quality cider, and soon, so apples wouldn't brown. Two medium-sized apples were plenty, and a good approximate measure when adding other fruit. Peel kiwis, not apples; cut grapes in half, slice the strawberries. Added agave nectar: a great natural sweetener that doesn't raise glucose levels. Can add ground cinnamon and/or other sweet spices, even vanilla. Optionally, add or top with nuts; walnuts work well. Even better served with a little cream or soymilk.
We went to Joe's, watched some of his latest DVDs. First, one about the Apollo missions including the first moon landing. They went through NASA's collection and put together a documentary of color footage, most of which has probably never been seen by anyone not connected with the space program. Pretty amazing stuff, especially with the comments from the participants then and now. Their feelings and observations, especially their thoughts while on the moon takes you there like no fictionalized account could. One of the astronauts (I couldn't tell which one) said he felt strangely at home on the moon.
Blueberries. Two or more years ago, Eddie gave us two blueberry bushes. Two different varieties so they can cross-pollinate in order to be productive, or something like that. Maybe someday I'll get into gardening, but not at the moment. The city-kid that's still in me is amazed, and they're good, too. One of my earliest memories - must've been about four or five years old - is of picking blueberries on a vacation in Upstate NY. That thrilled me then, picking fruit as it grew, and it was something I'd actually eat. There were very few foods I liked then.
These automatic bathrooms are pretty amazing. The toilet flushing on it's own is a little scary, though, but I like automatic faucets. It's like at some airports - the one in Atlanta. LaGuardia doesn't have the automatic bathrooms, if I remember right. Makes sense, though, as everything would be older there. Motion-detector paper towel dispensers blow my mind. The building I'm referring to also has motion-detector light switches everywhere. Walls may not have ears (one hopes), but ceilings have eyes. A Jean Cocteau world in the style of The Jetsons. I want my car to fold into a briefcase.
Family vacations, when I was a kid, were pretty good. I've never been to another country, to my regret, except for Niagara Falls on the Canadian side. We'd go after the first weeks in summer camp for Kenny & I, so "vacation"was August. Dad did loads of driving. The idea was to visit historic, educational sites, though it turned out in school, no one ever cared that I'd been to Gettysburg or Harper's Ferry. The last real trip, the BIG one, was Las Vegas/LA & Hollywood/Yosemite/San Francisco. For me at 12 years old, it was like another planet.
Saw a documentary about families coping with their children's cancer. Horrible. If you must be angry at something, you can be angry at cancer. Cancer took two of my cats, a friend, my uncle. Maybe more, but I can't think offhand of any I knew personally. It almost took my cousin, my mother and mother-in-law. It has taken lots of people I cared about but never knew. To torture a child, any child, that's worst of all. We who are well must guard against it with expensive, uncomfortable, invasive, painful examination procedures. DAMN cancer. It affects us all.
I usually have something in mind. Haven't had time or energy to write, so I've been keeping notes or just keeping an idea of what to write each day. Had no intention of bending the rules, but sometimes you just have to do what works. Been having too much pain from typing all day, which was a good reason to not write. Thought I could stand it, I needed the job, but it got to be too much. I don't wish to elaborate. I'm writing this on Sunday, sorry. I'm still hurting, but taking it a little at a time.
Wasted the day being depressed. There's nothing wrong with so-called mindless TV. We all need an escape. If there were no mindless, escapist TV, I'll bet you a lot more people would be doing drugs. "Opiate of the masses,"I don't know where that originated; is that supposedly TV or media in general? It's not that we all want to be sheep, we just need a break from reality. Life is hard and then we watch TV, go to the movies, listen to music, read a book. Sometimes we learn as we're entertained; sometimes we're entertained as we learn.
Finally caught up. Today is today. Talked about painting the bedroom. We painted our living room "Emerald Green"with ceiling and upper wall "Lupine,"a lavender, and trim in "Paradise Lost,"a dark, vibrant purple. The room I'm in is aqua, seafoam ceiling and red violet trim. A fairly dark blue will be more conducive to sleep than white, we've agreed. Tell me, why are ugly colors the fashion in paint? My theory: advertising uses vivid, attractive colors, so they are cheapened in some people's tastes. RIDICULOUS! We both prefer vivid, pleasing colors: tropical colors, I guess you could say.
We've been feeding the neighbors' black & white cat. To us, he's "Gato." Danny once tried to get his attention, "Cat, cat...,"but he turned to look with "Gato." Gato loves attention as much as the food and water. Their tabby is shy, but I'm glad we've seen him eat the food, too. They're quite thin. Seems they get neither food nor attention from their owners, not even from the kids, but kids learn by example. Their dog stays tied but is fed and occasionally let off his leash. For many reasons, this is all we can do for these cats.
Maybe I shouldn't get political here and don't claim to be very knowledgeable, but I know right from wrong. Everywhere, you see and hear, "Support our Troops,"and I do feel sorry for them. Too many deaths when there should be none, and for what? For a country who didn't ask for our help? It's entirely evident this war is for oil and profit; if not, we'd be at war in many other countries. Have so many people forgotten Vietnam, how tragic that war was and how stuck we were? My whole childhood, I remember - every night on the news.
I stopped in mid-laundry when I turned on the TV and the Scorsese documentary, No Direction Home, was on again. I've seen it before, maybe even taped it, but it's been a while. I hope people who know little or nothing about Bob Dylan take the time and an open mind to watch it if they have any interest in the history of music of the 20th century. Dylan is important not only for his influence and contribution, but because of the folk and blues artists who influenced him and his contemporaries. The interviews, the old films - very inspiring.
The tourist found himself falling into a manhole. "Ouch,"he thought, "This is unexpected." Suddenly, he was washed out to sea. "I won't be able to use the ticket for the play I was planning to see tonight," he muttered regretfully. "Would you like to be back in time for the play?"said a large fish caught in a net with many other fish. "Yes, I would,"the man yelled over the splashing, "But how?" "Touch my fin and we'll change places." "Hey, quit snoring!"came an angry whisper with a sharp elbow attached. "I'm trying to hear the actors!-
Many classes in general haven't been making lately, so I was lucky to have four students for my beginner class. Three generations: mother, daughter and grandmother plus another young woman. Got my routine fairly the same, but I ask them their interests to be sure. I talk about design, which was easier before my display case got stolen. I'll never get over that. I have them make earrings to learn basic wire turning, then crimping by making a bracelet, and demonstrate stretch cord & memory wire. I probably talk too much but I want to give as much knowledge as possible.
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