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April 23, 2007
When creating your self portrait, please refrain, under penalty of death (by my hand or foot, with or without accompanying implement to enhance the damage), from using your feet as the subject. Picture this: in the foreground, your feet -- either Converse-sneakered and crossed, or bare and turned slightly out as if you're in comfortable repose -- propped up on your Urban Outfitters beanbag chair; in the background, the TV, blurred, but not blurred enough to obscure the identifying yellowness of SpongeBob. Now picture this: Me bludgeoning you with a mace (old-fashioned spiky ball type, not the modern spray variety).