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March 10, 2007
A god must have raped your mother and spawned you. Which god?

I'm looking for a relationship grounded in honesty. You look fat in that.

Hi. My name's Hammer. Wanna get nailed?

Excuse me, but you seem to have urinated all over my face. You haven't? Oh, sorry. Sometimes fantasy precedes reality.

Save for a great many, you are the most beautiful woman in the whole world.

They let you come here often?

Do that again. I love when women fart.

Is that the inverse of a fat kielbasa in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?