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September 15, 2004
Every morning when I leave the gym, I pass through the café and take a paper-wrapped straw from the container on the shelf by the door. I don't like to do it when the workers might see, so I try to do it when their backs are turned. But sometimes I can't wait, so I just take one and bolt.

I put one of its ends in my mouth so they'll think, "Oh, she must be an ex-smoker. She needs this as a substitute for the cigarette she's craving! She's forgiven for not buying anything to go with that straw."