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October 12, 2003
It's beautiful. Shivers running through me. Mood swings and meditation. On the edge of tears, mixed with a half smile. This is hard to describe. I am sorry, you know. I didn't mean to. I really didn't.

It's inconsequential, I know. I promise I'll try harder next time. I promise I'll try harder to make it mean something to me. But it doesn't. You know that. You know that.

What did you think I was going to say? I'm all arteries and veins. I'm all false emotions. I'm all ungrateful matter.

I didn't even bother to remove my shoes first.