August 11, 2003
Even when I was "in love" with you, I thought your hairy back was disgusting. I tried to pretend I thought it was actually kinda cute, and that it didn't disgust me and make me think of all the girls in the world who probably vomit just at the mere mention of a hairy back, let alone the sight of one as thickly covered as yours. In a way I felt as noble as Mother Theresa, so selfless in my caring and "love" for you even though you were frightfully deformed. Oh, you hairy beast, it was all just charity!