September 3, 2002
Wow. Dark. It's one annoyance after another. I was thinking it was the heat, but there's no way. That's the initial disturbance upon waking up, but my sensitivity beyond that is like a runaway train. And it feeds upon itself. The negative state is cumulative and it spirals. My first class was last night, and despite Stuart's incredibly inspiring words, my work was less than powerful. I felt a blanket of mediocrity thrown over me, and it stayed there. It wasn't shit, but it's most likely affecting today. Do I enjoy this hateful filter? It's a constant furrowed brow existence.