October 9, 2019
I want to make up for lost time. I want to make up for lost love. Or rather, for mislaid love. It was never truly lost. I went wrong; we went wrong, and that wasn't clear to me at the time. It was so far from clear to me that the mistaken clarity I thought I felt now terrifies me. Because clarity can be clouds. I have to believe this is a return to real clarity. It feels that way. I thought I could deal with being without you; I thought I was dealing with it. I couldn’t, I wasn’t.