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October 31, 2017
I just pranced around the apartment singing "Chock Full O' Nuts is the heavenly coffee" in a variety of "styles", much to the consternation and dismay of my cat and anyone -- meter-checking ConEd guy, recyclables-sorting landlord, mailbox-checking tenant, Google-Maps-checking errant tourists looking for Zabar's who think I can guide them to bagels and rugelach because I must be one of them Jews they've heard so much about -- who may be lurking outside my door. I would say, "And I wonder why I'm single," but I know there's a fella out there who'd find all of this utterly enchanting.