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April 29, 2017
I know dreams are boring, but listen:

I was in heaven -- the most beautiful apartment. It had a waterfall and stunning views.

My landlord was showing me around, and I heard a man screaming that he was being held in this place against his will. He came out to confront my landlord.

"Oh, Steamed Dumpling, uh, this is Steamed Dumpling," he said, introducing me to the crazy man, who was me.

"Don't ask me any questions!" said crazy Steamed Dumpling. "I want to get out of here!"

Deeply uncomfortable, I considered moving out of heaven to get away from myself.