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December 12, 2016
12/13: My boyfriend asked my parents if he had permission to marry me and they immediately said yes. I guess that's a good sign. He came to visit my dad in the hospital when he was sick. 

And you wanna know what horrible things my brain thinks? They're so horrible that I don't want to repeat them here. I am just paranoid, but it might be right. He wants to get married quickly. I want to get married quickly so the sex won't be an issue. Because I will feel secure then. He comes home with me. That's it.