November 23, 2016
Four years ago my dad left this world. I cannot use the "d" word. Whenever I mention the event of his leaving to someone, I leave the equivalent of an underscore, often doing a slight "brrrrp" sound with my mouth or another noise I can't describe but which probably sounds to the listener like I'm suffering some kind of intestinal distress. But no matter what word I use or don't use, what sound I make, it all means the same thing and it all means that he's not here and never will be and that, oh, look now I'm crying.