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February 1, 2016
I was struck in the left gluteal muscle with a projectile fired by a cherub. Noticing his intention to continue his assault on others passers-by, I gave chase. He was fast, but lacked endurance, and after several blocks I caught and strangled him.

A previous review of arrows fired by small, wingèd humanoids (Shah et al., 1983) found a large percentage of them had been envenomed with a cocktail of neurotoxins. With this in mind, I presented at the ER. Laboratory tests proved negative. The nurse on duty declared the wound superficial and offered a lollipop, which I declined.