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August 18, 2013
A new bar? SCREW bar!
No need for it 'round here;
for the new bar would be FUBAR
if its served up much more than beer!

Now don't get me wrong, folksters;
this 'sports bar' thing has gone a little too far.
They're popping up like flies on dogshit,
bringing their noisy revelers
to gawk and squawk at giant flat panel televisions.

So when JD the master burrito chef decided to close up shop, selling out to one of those redundant jockstrap ethanol-swilling putz collection agencies, we were duly depressed.

But in the grand scheme of things, it was best.