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March 17, 2013
This is the paralysis where depression starts. A growing list of things I'm supposed to get done, due dates approaching, avoidance and anxiety about changes coming in a few relationships that are very painful, and the need to self sooth. So I say to myself, "It's ok. You can sit here in your "easy chair" for another hour, until you feel centered; you've been busy lately, you deserve just an hour (or so) to yourself. It's ok." The clock ticks the hours by and now it's dusk. Another day has gone by. I didn't start the list yet. Paralysis builds.