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January 8, 2013
Lonely Lotharios, would-be wooers, and sundry cyber-studs: The time I could've spent indulging your offers to "role-play" before I even know your names or using the phone numbers you provided, unsolicited, has been spent culling through your impressive dating profiles. You may want to tone down the boastful tone when declaring that you only read non-fiction and hold off on haughtily mentioning your disdain for cats. If you took the time to look beyond the photos of these webcam Mensans and their desperate cleavage, you'd see the lone book in their Hello Kitty-outfitted apartments is a dog-eared chick lit paperback.