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November 22, 2012
“YOU HAD SWINGS of emotional states: very intense and happy, and then something would come in your eyes. ... I wondered and felt helpless about all the pain you carried.”

What would I have said had you told me that 25 years ago? It’s not something I had a language for yet.

By the time we met I had largely had my fill of people: Even Matt, which made it easy for me to betray him.

I funneled all my passion for life, and it was considerable, into us.

“You and me against the world!” I said.

Poor goddamned John. Agh.