July 6, 2012
Those morsels you're popping into your mouth at the salad bar are not free samples, and you know it. You know it because after I witness you acting like you're at your cousin's wedding reception at Old Country Buffet, I tell you. I tell you this is not your living room, that you have to pay like everyone else. You thank me with what I take to be polite appreciation and humble humanity, so I give you the benefit of the doubt. Thank you for proving me wrong literally three seconds later, when you do it again in plain sight.