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June 6, 2012
Dear Josh Slates,

We are a bunch of yokels who, by sheer good fortune or otherwise, have the time to stand around and titter while you film your Hollywood movie in our Dogpatch business district. We enjoy being barred from our grocery store, pharmacy, book and consignment shops for a week, detouring around Bridge Street like we do whenever the area floods or there’s boondoggle street repair afoot, and peering at the back of your massive reflectors, seeing nothing of the well-paid stars on the other side.

If you have questions, please feel free to contact us directly.

— Townies