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March 13, 2012
My right knee has been clicking for about two months, causing some pain extending to my hip if I move it into certain positions, so instead of dealing with pesky doctors and their MRIs and x-rays and the possibility of having to remove my pants, I assess the situation by placing my ear on my knee, extending the leg, circling the ankle, listening to what sounds like a moped rolling over a sparsely-filled baggie of gravel, and trying hard not to panic because I've just watched 50/50 and thus have no choice but to diagnose myself with late-stage multi-syllabic cancer.