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June 17, 2001
I am the greatest backup singer Bon Jovi has ever had. I have the power to inflict thunderstorms upon Des Moines and Omaha, all in one day. I am omnipotent. I have stood on rooftops and thrown lightning bolts at great lakes. I am faster than the wind and am more beautiful than sunset. I am fucking brilliant. I have sunk a thousand ships, and then walked upon the water.

(I break hearts, too, and then say things I do not mean. I can drive 19 hours to come and see you, but I can do no more than that.)