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December 12, 2011
My new pillows declare they're to be used for all sleep positions. I doubted the veracity of that claim, so I tried every traditional position. Still not convinced, and rife with the usual buyer's remorse, I tried other variations as well, including a headstand, handstand, several Pilates tricks, and that one-legged Karate Kid thing.

Meanwhile, the pillows' perkiness is making my bed look like it's wearing a push-up bra, which has earned the whole shebang the admiration of a "plush" moose named Harold and, I'm sure, my landlord the next time he comes down here to engage in uncomfortable conversation.