January 1, 2007
The bright yellow rubber rain boots were cute when you bought them, but now, standing on the subway platform, screaming words I can't hear as my train whizzes by you and your boyfriend, you're hating them because you can't take yourself seriously when your feet look like they belong to a toddler. Had you only known you'd be fighting today, you would've worn your black platform boots with the heel that you'd be more than happy to be shoving up his ass right now. You would've left the mittens home, too. Giving him "the finger" in mittens makes no impact.