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December 27, 2006
His ad said he was "attractive", which should've been the first red flag. It was 1998, and I had not yet learned that if someone is just "attractive", he'll say he's "very good-looking". So "attractive" meant "I am actually quite hideous."

And he was. Fortunately, though, his jacket, while greenish, wasn't as green as he'd told me, because if it were a definite green, it would've made my leap to "frog" easier insofar as his appearance was concerned. No offense to regular frogs, who are adorable, but this fella had their eyes.

All this, and he scolded the waitress. Hideous!