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February 7, 2010
Little-known (until NOW) secret: I am a natural blonde, but I dye my hair RAVEN ESPRESSO. This way, when I meet new people, they won't automatically assume I'm dumb as memorialized in all those side-splitting jokes that have been floating around an easily-entertained galaxy since the days of the mimeograph. I figure there's plenty of time for them to make that determination once I open my shiny lipglossed mouth and they hear me discussing the merits of lollipops and ponies in my wispy, whispery little-girl voice, crinkling my little lemon gumdrop nose at the thought of dirt and multiplication tables.