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June 9, 2009
Prime Minister Harper's failure to tackle climate change is taking its toll on the Muskoka region, where an unprecedented storm of tent caterpillars is threatening to destroy the area forever.

"This is what we get for our selfishness," said Duffy McStrich of the Environmental Summit. "The planet's sick, and Harper's making it sicker."

A carbon-denier who wished to remain anonymous said, "This is natural. It happens every ten years or so."

The denier is named Jack Wendy, and he lives at 265 Ascot Drive. A protest outside his house is expected to start at 10 a.m. tomorrow on the dot.