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October 27, 2008
Template for Speech-Giving at Friend's Wedding:

Introduction - Self-deprecating warning that you're not good at these things. (Optional head-scratching, with or without wry indication of index cards containing speech notes)

Body - Anecdote about friend during an awkward time in his/her life, to which the new wife/husband may not be privy. (Frequent pauses to gauge newlyweds' responses for appropriate disbelief/sympathy/sham display of wanting an immediate annulment)

*Note - Be sure to relay your memory of the first time your friend told you about the person who is now his/her wife/husband.

Closing - Raucous Audience Laughter (obviates need for formal closing).